Peach on Crack
by cindyhasi
Summary: Peach bought tea from a strange guy, without knowing it contains crack. Peach shares the tea with fellow smashers and all hell breaks loose and chaos ensues in the mansion.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own SSBB or its characters.**

**Happy Birthday bro! **** This is for you. You're the best brother in the world and always make me happy when I'm down. There might be some swearing and violence in this story. And there are characters that aren't in the SSBB game but there are some OCs and other characters that I will have in another SSBB story. If you have questions just put it in a review or PM me.**

Chapter 1: Tea

It was lovely day at Smash Mansion. There were no fights scheduled today and not even smashers were fighting about little things at all. Master Hand and Crazy Hand left for a few days day leaving the smashers on their own since there would seemingly no trouble for a few days. Peach felt particularly great today for no reason and enjoyed some tea she recently bought in the backyard. Listening to birds chirping she quietly sipped her delicate tea out of the small cup, not knowing how drastically the day would change. Her thought drifted to how tasty the tea was and she made a note to herself to buy some more from that mysterious man with his mysterious little shop. Although what Peach didn't get why the tea was quite expensive.

She sat outside a while longer before she rose to go back into the mansion. She felt really happy, energized and a bit hyper. The princess kept on wondering what was in this tea, little did she know the man sold her tea with crack. As she was planning on giving everyone some of the wonder tea, weird obsessions and urges started to form in her mind. She didn't know quite what and shrugged. Surely it would pop in her mind later.

As she entered she stumbled upon the kids whizzing around the entrance room hopping over the few couches. Ness, Lucas, Nana, Popo and Toon Link were playing tag. All of a sudden Peach needed to get discipline into the kids.

"What the hell? NO running in the house, go play outside and do your frigging homework!" Peach screamed whipping out her frying out of nowhere ready to spank them.

"Toon Link feebly tried to protest "But Peach we have no homework, we don't go to scho-"

"Shut up and don't back talk! I don't care; go to your ROOMS and STUDY!" Peach yelled making the wall tremble and the kids pee their pants.

"Study what?" scared Nana asked.

"GO!" bellowed Peach in a threatening way holding her frying pan tightly and making the kids zip up the stairs with lightning speed.

On her way to the kitchen she spotted Ike coming out of the kitchen his indigo hay ever so ruffled and never brushed as always and a fatty chicken leg in one hand. Spotting Peach he greeted her.

"Hey, Peach! You gonna cook something with the fry pan?" Ike asked with some chicken in his mouth, not noticing how Peach's face had started become distorted. She HAD to cut Ike hair now and brush it! Nose scrunched up and her blood over the boiling point, about to blow up like a volcano, she shoved a baffled Ike back into the kitchen. Poor Ike had no idea what was going on and just sat at the table dearly holding on to his half eaten chicken leg.

"Peach, what's wrong?" Ike asked as he saw Peach whipping out her wonder tea, which she wanted to share with everyone, making a teapot full of it and poured some in a cup. "You have some tea, while I fix your hair that you never brush or take care of! And haven't you ever heard of FORK and KNIFE!?" Peach exclaimed angry before she cooled down a bit. Noticing Ike not drinking tea and probably thinking on fleeing, which he actually was, Peach pulled out her frying pan glaring at Ike. "Ike, drink the tea!" She really wanted to share tea. Ike quickly chugged down the tea, whipped around and yelled "Peach the teapot is about to fall off the counter!" Peach concerned for her wonderful tea whipped around only to see the teapot sitting perfectly still on the counter and when she turned around, an Ike shape was in the wall where he crashed through to save himself, or maybe his hair. "Ike!" Peach was really angry now. She decided she would search for more smashers to share the tea taking some with her.

Five heads popped up from hiding staring at the broken wall and at the open kitchen door. "You think it's safe now, Ness?" Lucas quietly asked. "Yeah, should be" Ness answered. "Okay, let's go I'm thirsty!" Toon Link called storming into the kitchen, the other kids following behind him.

Nana spotted the half- filled teapot and poured some in a cup "Hey guys Peach says this tea is really good. Do you want to try some, too?" Nana asked as she sipped the tea.

"No, tea is gross" Toon Link retorted.

"Not that one" Nana protested.

"I will try some" Lucas said and took some tea.

"I guess we I will, too" Ness and Popo said in unison. Toon Link was now the only one not drinking tea. With a snort he took tea and exclaimed "I bet I will spit it out right away" But he didn't. He was so amazed that he liked the tea that he was left speechless. Toon Link suddenly pulled out his arrows pointing at Nana's butt. To him Nana's butt looked like a round target as he aimed for the middle. Nana just stepped away as Toon Link let go of the arrow, as he aimed at the target circle he was starting to see on everybody's butt. And he was determined to hit "bulls eye". The arrow got stuck in the wood of the cupboard beside Nana. Her eyes were as wide as saucers. But instead of ripping Toony's head off, she turned to Popo and grinned. In a blink of an eye they whizzed off towards where the cooler is installed for really hot days at the mansion, although it was broken, because Master Hand didn't want to pay to fix it and nobody wanted to do it.

Toon Link now readied his bow and tried to get behind poor Lucas and Ness. The two boys quickly nodded at each other and used their psychic powers to trick Toon Link to go find other victims. Now them on crack, too, they both had the same weird obsession.

"Hey, Lucas this is fun! Let's mess with more people's minds!"

"Yeah!" Both boys ran out of the kitchen to terrorize smashers.

**I thought this was gonna be a one-shot but it's gonna have some chapters. I hope you like it so far **


	2. Chapter 2

**Here's chapter 2! :D**

Chapter 2: Chaos

It took only five minute for the tea to get Ike horny and he really wanted to date EVERYTHING. Right now Ike tried with no avail to show a flower pot his manliness and expressing love. He was getting frustrated.

"Flower babe, you gotta tell me when you want to start rolling upstairs! Soooo, what's your favorite color?"

Silence.

"Well, what would you like to do?" He asked that question already a hundred times.

Silence.

"You know what!? That's it, I'm through with you bitch! I will find someone who appreciates me!" Ike stomped off, but came back again and yelled "I know you favorite color is green, because you wear it all the time!" and stomped out again.

Just after a few minutes of being rejected by a flower pot Ike bumped into Roy.

"Heeey ~"

"Hi Ike, I'm trying to find Marth so I can annoy him. Do you know where he is?"

"No, but how about we go upstairs and have some fun? Hmmm?" Ike was grinning and wiggled with his eyebrows. It was creepy.

"Ike, you okay?"

"Yeah, cutie. I really wanna nail you."

Roy abruptly turned around dashing off, while screaming "Shit! Ike's insane and horny!"

Poor Ike couldn't believe it. Rejected. Again. But he wouldn't give up there were lots of fish in the sea and he wanted to date them all. So he kept on going on his quest.

Nana and Popo arrived at the cooler.

"Guess we will have to fix it first" Popo stated.

"Well, the faster we get done, the faster we can get the mansion ice cold" Nana said with a big smile. So they started repairing it, or at least they tried and thought they were doing it right. Of course they didn't do it right though, since neither of them knew how to fix it.

Ike was now in the backyard, but nobody was there so he started his way back inside. He didn't notice Toon Link camouflaging in a bush, bow set and ready to fire. With a war cry he released the arrow hitting Ike right on the left butt cheek. With a 'Yeah!', Toon Link ran off, put a mark besides Ike's name on his hit list and looked for more "targets".

Ike screamed and pulled out the arrow. He quickly hid the wound with the cape; he didn't want to be bleeding when he was dating; and went to his room on the second floor to look after it.

Peach was carrying a tray full of tea. She was heading towards the large living room; usually there were quite a few smashers. In the living room, all smashers were there except Marth, Mario, Kyle and Oscar.

"Nice day, everybody! I made some tea for all of you" she happily announced with a smile. Some smasher didn't look happy, but they didn't want to piss Peach off, because she can be quite destructive with her frying pan. So everybody in the room ended up drinking tea. In two minutes hell broke loose. Ivysaur shot its vines on every object making a jungle out of vines. All the other smashers exited to the hallway, except Wolf who was now swinging in the vines playing Tarzan. Kirby ran off towards the Dr. Mario's Health Center. Dr. Mario wasn't at the mansion for a while, because he finally got a vacation.

Roy abruptly spanked Peach and Link and raced off grinning like a maniac and laughing. Everybody now ran off in different directions, Samus trying to kick others in painful areas while running. Or, in Zelda's case, happily skipped off singing about flowers. Peach decided to go find Marth, Mario, Kyle and Oscar and give them some tea.

Toon Link dashed through the halls and stopped when he spotted Mario in the entrance hall. Mario had his back turned to him. Toony's eyes shone with joy as he fired an arrow at Mario's butt.

"MAMA MIA! IT-A HURTS!" Mario screamed, a tear rolling down his cheek as the arrow hit him right in the butt crack.

"BULLS-EYE!" Toon shouted overjoyed, before happily racing off checking off the plumbers name on his hit list like a criminal.

Mario was on the floor moaning in pain.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: A bad day for Marth

Kirby was rummaging through Dr. Mario's stuff and found a syringe. Kirby was wearing a doctor's outfit and was determined to be a doctor. Right now he had the idea to "immunize" people, but of course he had no idea how to properly do it or what the liquid was he put in the syringe.

Nana and Popo were getting frustrated since the Cooler system only looked more broken now.

"Isn't there instructions to that" Popo complained. The cooler looked like a piece of junk now.

"Hey, Popo, I think I found it over here!"

"Awesome Nana! Let's do this!"

In the backyard Jigglypuff thought she was a hot air balloon, while R.O.B thought he was the engine. R.O.B was holding on to Jigglypuff's legs as they flew off into the air, with Jigglypuff which was 10 times its normal size. King Dedede was flying around on his hammer but crashed into a tree Donkey Kong was sitting in, snapping it in half and flew away again. Donkey Kong was crying now over his beloved tree and slowly found another one to sit in for no reason.

Ganondorf smiled as he stepped back to admire his work. He had a bucket full of mud and rotten eggs balancing over the entrance door on a string and well hidden. Since everybody was running inside and outside, he was sure somebody would fall for the prank. Settling down on a couch he pretended he was napping and waited.

Marth had heard screams, shouts, and Roy shouting "spanked!" all over the place. The prince was wondering what was going on, but didn't feel like checking it out. So instead he plopped down on the couch in the entrance hall and started reading a book. Then he noticed Ganondorf napping. 'That's weird Ganondork usually doesn't nap. Oh well, whatever, everybody seems crazy today' Marth thought and kept on reading.

Ganondorf was a bit disappointed when he saw Marth starting to read. He would have loved to see the contents of the bucket spilling all over the teen. He hated Marth and Marth hated him.

Marth only had 10 seconds to read before Charizard bowled in and licked him all over the face with its big tongue, ruffling up Marth's hair. Marth so confused and surprised with saliva sliding off his face that he just stared, so Charizard licked again.

"Stop-" Lick "Char-" Lick "What is-" Lick "Charizard SIT!" Charizard sat down right away wagging its tail and looking up at Marth. Marth started walking around the room. Charizard followed. "Shouldn't you be with your trainer?" Marth asked. Charizard looked at Marth with puppy eyes now. 'What is wrong with everybody? Seriously, now Charizard is acting like a dog' Marth thought. And then Marth realized something. Charizard thought Marth was his Master. Then Marth had an idea and smirked looking over at Ganondorf. Marth walked over, Charizard right behind him.

"Pee" Marth commanded pointing at Ganondorf. Ganondorf shot his eyes open, but too late. At first Charizard didn't know what to do, but quickly started piddling all over Ganondorf. Laughing, Marth raced off into the hallway Charizard at his heels. "Bastard!" Ganondorf yelled, but didn't chase after Marth. Marth was way faster than him. "The next prank is gonna be really nasty and only for you princey" Ganondorf mumbled walking off towards his room to shower.

Roy was now sporting a helmet, had a hit list and a fly swatter. The boy was hiding behind a corner, ready to sprint, watching Snake set up security cameras, mines, lasers and other technology stuff. Snake stepped back to look his work when suddenly Roy shot out, held the fly swatter high up and slammed it down on Snake's ass. Snake howled up in pain and turned around only to see Roy already vanished somewhere else to harass other poor souls.

Zelda was depressed crying in a corner. Samus came around panting. She had already kicked grumpy Ganondorf, an unsuspecting horny Ike, Roy who spanked her at the same time with a frigging fly swatter and Pikachu after she flung him off against a wall while he had been snapping at her and biting into her arm. Samus was dumfounded. Zelda was already in pain. After a minute of thinking Samus walked up to her, yanked at her hair, hard, and sped off for other victims. Zelda cried in agony and sniffed something about how cruel and dark the world is along with its inhabitants, and shampoo. Samus already found the next victim in the next room.

Lucario was chugging booze. He was on his 11th bottle now. He quickly sensed Samus, turned around, and before she could kick him in the face, he puked right into her face covering it in vomit. Disgusted she backed away, but screamed when an arrow dug itself in her butt cheek accompanied by a 'Hiyaa!' from Toon Link whizzing out of hiding.

Falco thought he was a rooster and was perched on top of the mansion's roof, screeching his lungs out. It sounded terrible.

Link was standing under the Chandelier staring at the sparkling object. He wanted to touch the beauty, but couldn't, since he wasn't able move his gaze away from the Chandelier. Pit was right next to the Chandelier. But he wasn't obsessed with shiny objects; he was hugging the ceiling and talking nonsense for no reason. Heck, nobody knows how he did it, not even Pit himself.

In an empty storage room Yoshi was hording eggs and sitting on them. The room was about a quarter filled with the green dotted eggs.

Marth busted into the cafeteria, Charizard behind him, laughing like crazy. His sides hurt and now he was nearly rolling on the ground, not noticing Kyle and Oscar staring at him in confusion.

"What's up with him?" Oscar asked.

"Don't know" Kyle answered.

After two minutes of being stared at, Marth managed to calm down and was giggling, while Charizard tried to lick him.

"What made you so happy?" Kyle asked Marth.

"I, Ganon-"Marth tried to tell, but failed miserably, laughing uncontrollably. Finally calmed down, he answered "Charizard thinks I'm his Master and I found Ganondork napping, so I let Charizard pee all over him"

Now Kyle and Oscar had to smile, too, as they imagined the scene.

"Come on, Charizard we're getting a snack" Marth wandered into the kitchen, giggling.

"How the hell does a guy giggle?" Oscar wondered.

"I bet he's the only guy in the world that can giggle" Kyle stated.

Sonic was running around (when is he not?), but stopped short when he saw a mesmerized Link and Pit hugging the ceiling.

Roy had now only a few people left on his hit list. His eyes were literally sparkling with joy as he spotted Sonic not moving. SONIC. NOT. MOVING. This was his chance! His spanking weapon was now a baseball bat. He got tired of the fly swatter. With lightning speed he dashed up to poor Sonic and hit him right on the ass with all his might. Sonic screamed, and was flung up at the ceiling so hard that his quills got stuck. So stuck, that no amount of wiggling, swinging, or pulling could get the hedgehog out.

"This is EPIC!" Roy yelled running off.

Sonic then saw to his horror how Toon Link entered the room and grinned like a maniac. He positioned himself under Sonic and fired the arrow. Sonic screamed as Toon Link yelled "Bulls eye!" before firing several arrow at Pit's butt, but all missed, because he moved while holding onto the ceiling. It was so weird and looked so wrong that Toon Link actually gave up on Pit and rested his eyes on Link who was STILL staring at the stupid chandelier. Sonic was crying now and it rained tears from the ceiling. Only now Link realized that he thought he had heard somebody scream and turned just in time to jump away from the arrow coming at his ass.

"Stop moving!" Toon Link yelled, readying another arrow.

"NO!" Link yelled back before running out of the room in search of other shiny things.

Captain Falcon was running outside around yelling some shit about justice that didn't even make sense and nobody cared about. He was only wearing speedos and his helmet. Unfortunately for Toon Link he walked outside only to run back inside screaming "MY EYES, THEY BURN!" and be scarred for life.

"I can't take this anymore! Come on Lucas, we gonna shut Falco up!"

"But, Ness, he thinks he's a rooster! What are you going to do?"

Ness and Lucas stood on the roof now covering their ears. Ness smirked when he used his psychic powers, making Falco jump off the roof. The building was quite high. The boys heard a loud _THUD _and peered over the edge. Falco was sprawled out on the grass.

"You think he's dead, Ness?" Lucas asked, shaking.

"Nah, just unconscious. Come on, let's go have some fun!"

Marth and Charizard stared. Just stared. In the kitchen all the cabinets and any other storage where food should be was TEA. Half of the humongous amount was already used and empty. While the other half of packages were still full. And on top of it Olimar was trying to cook his wailing Pikmins in a soup pot. Marth had an odd feeling about that tea.

"What the hell!? Olimar!?" Didn't Olimar love his Pikmin!?

"Hi Marth! Want some soup?" Olimar asked.

"NO!" Marth's stomach turned upside down at the thought. The prince scooted over to the tons and tons of tea. 'Did Peach go nuts or something!? Why is everybody so weird today?' Since there was nothing to eat, except Pikmin Barf Soup as Marth called it, he exited back to the cafeteria, Charizard trailing behind him. Another wail from Pikmins was heard.

"What's going on in the kitchen?" Oscar asked.

"Olimar is making soup out of his Pikmin and there's nothing to eat. Only tons of tea" Marth answered.

Peach entered the cafeteria and was thrilled to see Oscar, Kyle and Marth. Marth. As soon as she had seen the prince, Peach had only one thing in mind: kill Marth. It kept on repeating itself in her mind and suddenly she busted into the kitchen past the confused guys and came back with a huge knife, locking her eyes on Marth. Marth quickly dodged as Peach lashed out with the weapon with a war cry.

Marth standing back asked panting "What the hell is wrong Peach!?"

But Peach didn't answer. Marth raced off as fast as he could with Peach running after him. Hyped from the crack Peach was even able to run so fast that she could keep Marth in sight.

"What the…" Oscar stared after them completely confused.

"Oscar, come on, we gonna kill Peach." Oscar started to catch on what Kyle was saying.

"If she kills him we can't make his life hell and if anybody kills him it's us!" Kyle and Oscar ran off trying to find Peach and Marth.

This was all too fast for Charizard staring after the bunch. The Pokémon flew out of the cafeteria trying to find his beloved Master and maul his attacker to shreds.

Luigi had come upon Peach's roses she planted. And started burning them.

Sheik was running out the front gates, when she stopped like a deer caught in headlights as to her horror, she witnessed Wario farting so terribly that birds stupid enough to fly over him landed dead on the gravel. He was in the way. But Sheik needed to get to stores NOW. So holding her breath she ran up to the fat farting man and kicked him so hard that he went flying into some village where innocent children and parents would suffer at his arrival. Sheik zoomed off into town.

**Yay! Chapter 3 done. Oh yeah in my stories I usually have Sheik as separate person from Zelda and as girl. Oh and if you're confused about Kyle and Oscar they come from my fire emblem story.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Survival, Tea and Showdown

Game & Watch tried really, really hard. He, a judge, that's what he thought, was being ignored and no amount of hitting his gavel against the podium, which was actually a small table, could bring order. Smashers kept on running around harassing him and each other.

Ghirahim was standing in his room admiring himself in a mirror.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall who is the most fabulous of all?" he asked the mirror.

Roy happened to walk by, looking at his hit list. "Let's see who is missing… Marth!" just as Roy said 'Marth' he walked by Ghirahim door.

Ghirahim was devastated. The mirror told him Marth was more fabulous. The demon quickly got angry. 'Well, then I will kill that brat and then I'M the MOST FABULOUS!' Ghirahim thought.

"But, miss, this scarf is laid back for another customer-"

"I DON'T CARE! Now sell me that frigging scarf, cuz I WANT IT!" Sheik was yelling at a poor clerk for a scarf. She already bought over two hundred scarfs and had emptied all the shops, except two and the one she was currently terrorizing the clerk in. Sheik couldn't take it anymore, so she punched the clerk unconscious and grabbed the scarf leaving the store.

Marth was still on the run. No matter through how many rooms he ran and windows he jumped out, Peach wouldn't leave. Marth was halted in his track though when Ghirahim appeared in front of him and he barely avoided a magic attack by flipping backwards. Instead, to Marth's relief, it knocked the crazed Peach out.

"What now" Marth complained.

"I will rip your face apart and then you won't be fabulous anymore!" Ghirahim shouted. He really wanted to be the most fabulous.

Marth was so pissed now that he ran up to a startled Ghirahim with dashing speed, pulled out a large fish out of nowhere and hit the demon across the face, sending him flying.

"Where did they go?" Oscar asked while teleporting into different rooms.

"Oscar I found them, they are outside!" Kyle shouted, watching Marth hit Ghirahim in the face with the fish.

Marth was greeted after the fish attack with Charizards' tongue. After calming down Marth looked over to Peach, who was lying on the grass motionless. 'Is she dead?' Marth thought, walked over and crouched down poking the unconscious princess on the cheek. Marth sprang back expecting her to lunge at him only to bump into Rayquaza, his lovely pet. "Hey Rayquaza" Marth petted the huge Pokémon, while Rayquaza rubbed his head against Marth. Rayquaza quickly stopped as soon as he saw Charizard rubbing itself against HIS Master and growled. Charizard growled back, jealous at Rayquaza. "Hey, you two, stop" Marth tried to stop them, but ended up squished between the two Pokémon that fiercely growled and stared at each other.

Marth just squeezed out in time, before the two started fighting, violently attacking each other. Both flew up and continued their fight in the air, while snapping trees in the forest and making Donkey Kong cry.

Peach woke up determined on her goal.

Marth turned around and dodged as Peach slashed at his throat with the huge knife. Marth didn't waste a second and bolted off back inside the mansion with Peach after him.

Snake's eyes were sparkling as he looked at his accomplishment. The hallway was filled with sensors, mines, lasers, guns and other traps. 'Nobody could ever get past that!' Snake happily thought. Marth zipped by running for his life, avoiding all the traps, and Peach after him avoiding all the traps, too. Snake was gaping like a fish on land. 'How!?' was the only thing that crossed his mind. Since Marth and Peach got through, Snake wanted to try it, too. And failed. Snake set off everything and BOOM! An eight of the mansion blew up with a mushroom explosion. Poor Snake survived and tried to light a cigarette while lying under rubble, but it burned to ash in his hand. Diddy Kong came by and wanted to check on Snake, maybe cheer him up, but due to his explosive bladder he ended up peeing all over the man and make him feel more miserable.

Fox had finally found something to tattoo smashers with. Well, actually he was quite desperate and had found a soldering iron in the heap of junk up in the attic. He really wanted to give tattoos! 'Oh, well, whatever' Fox thought and walked away intend on tormenting some poor victim. Stepping out of the attic he didn't see Bowser and in matter of seconds, Bowser pulled down Fox's pants exposing underwear. Fox growled and menacingly, but fast, went after Bowser. Bowser was so slow that Fox only need to walk fast to catch up with him. Angry Fox promptly burned him and Bowser yelled in pain. Diddy Kong came flying through a window, don't ask me why I don't know, accidently peed in Bowser eyes, who screamed again and rolled down the stairs in front of him. Diddy Kong left again and Fox smirked, satisfied by his revenge. Until he felt sharp little teeth sink in his bushy tail and yelled in pain trying to pry Pikachu off, but only got closer to the stairs of doom. Fox hit Pikachu on the head and even burned its fur, but the Pokémon didn't let go. Fox yelped as he tumbled down the stairs and landed on the spikes of an unconscious turtle. Ouch. Even though both of them were unconscious, Pikachu kept on biting them and pulled on Fox's tail.

"Geez, we lost them AGAIN!" Kyle yelled, very annoyed that Peach was making Marth's life hell, which was his job. "I can't run around anymore!" Plus mainly him and Oscar avoided a spanking Roy, horny Ike, biting Pikachu, Samus, Toon link and a depressed Zelda followed them for a while wailing their ears full before happily skipping off.

"What do you want to do then?" Oscar growled. He was annoyed, too, not so much though, since he was teleporting the whole time and didn't have to run and avoided most of the attackers, but got surprised by Samus with a kick in the stomach earlier.

"We wait at the front entrance; they are bound to pass there sometime." Kyle answered.

Ganondorf had just completed the prank for Marth. It included one of those wolf traps that snap together. Luigi had destroyed all of Peach's roses and looked for something else to burn. The plumber walked past Ganondorf, then jogged back and set Ganondorf hair in flames. Ganondorf tried to put the green (Luigi has green fire) flames out and hurled swear words at Luigi, who ran off a while ago, when random reporters that tried to sell a shampoo popped up.

"And here we are live at the Smash Mansion! Look at this happy man" the reporter pointed at Ganondorf "and his beautiful green hair! It fits perfectly with his olive skin! His hair is wonderful in color and super silky. Buy our shampoo today" the reporter said. Ghirahim appeared after showering for half an hour to get the fish smell off. "Oh please, that's not beautiful. I am beautiful" the demon stated proudly "how much does the shampoo cost?" "$20 a bottle" the reporter answered. Ghirahim bought 10 bottles and teleported away to find Marth. The reporter and his crew left again, while Ganondorf tripped over his own legs trying to get the fire out. Squirtle had been trying the whole time to find somebody to soak with water gun, but wherever Squirtle showed up, nobody was there. Squirtle used water gun as soon as he had seen Ganondorf. The water put out the flames and pushed Ganondorf right into his own prank. Trying to suppress manly tears after a loud_ Snap!_ Ganondorf limped off to his room.

Mario had been lying on the same spot for 1 1/2 hours in pain. He already tried pulling the arrow out, but it hurt too much, so Mario left it stuck in his butt. The plumber saw Kirby coming around a corner. Surely he would help him. Kirby was about to go to the left to find smasher, but turned around when he heard Mario call him. Kirby rushed over with joy that he could finally play doctor. Mario realized his mistake and tried to get away from Kirby by crawling over the floor without moving much. It didn't help and only looked wrong. Kirby reached Mario and pulled out a syringe from his bag with something filled in there. "Mama Mia!" Mario yelled, now concerned for his own life. Kirby never learned how to handle a syringe, so he rammed it into Mario's arm. Kirby tried to yank out the arrow, which didn't work and only made Mario scream. Kirby rummaged around in his bag, while trying to find items to perform surgery on the passed out Mario.

Sheik headed back to the mansion. She bought about 300 scarfs, two bags of shirts with cute Pokémon on them when she saw them in the last store and stole some jewelry for no reason.

While Marth was fleeing from Peach and Link, he was thinking about the tea. Link had pitched in when he saw the shiny tiara and wanted to get it now. Whatever was wrong with the smashers, had to do with the tea, Marth was sure. The prince didn't bother figuring out what was exactly in the tea. He had a plan: to destroy the rest of the tea in the kitchen. Marth raced to the kitchen, Peach and Link behind him. Suddenly when Marth was about halfway through the cafeteria he was hit in the face with an object. Jason (Pokémon Trainer) had thrown a Pokeball at Marth, yelling "Go Pokeball!'. He tried to catch people with his Pokeball instead of Pokémon.

"Sto-"Another Pokeball was thrown. The ball landed on the floor and rolled away. Peach stepped on the Pokeball of Doom, fell and hit her head on the floor, knocking herself out.

"Ja-"

"Go Pokeball!"

"Seriously, st-" Poor Marth was now trying to dodge or catch the objects, while fending Link off, who was nearly hugging Marth, trying to grab the tiara.

"Go Pokeball!" Jason was getting quite impatient.

"Link! Ja-"

"Go Pokeball! Go Pokeball! Go Pokeball!" Jason was now saying 'Go Pokeball!' nonstop and so fast you'd think he was trying to win a prize, while hurling rapidly barrages of Pokeballs at Marth and Link. Marth was hit nonstop with at least ten Pokeballs at the same time. Link didn't care; he was only concentrating on the tiara. "THAT'S IT!" Marth yelled and managed to catch a Pokeball. He threw it right into Jason's face so hard that he knocked him out. Marth tried to run to the kitchen, but Link had latched himself onto the prince's back and wrapped his legs and an arm around Marth, in an attempt to stay on and get the tiara. Marth finally reached the kitchen, trying the whole time to pry Link off and keeping Link from taking the tiara. Using one arm to keep Link from grabbing his headpiece, Marth called Rayquaza. The big Pokémon crashed through a wall along with Charizard. Both were beat up from fighting and still wanted to fight, but turned their attention to Marth waiting for a command. Marth kicked open the kitchen door and kicked Olimar out. Link was STILL on his back. Charizard walked in through the door. Since Rayquaza didn't fit through the door, he destroyed the wall separating the cafeteria and kitchen.

"Rayquaza, Hyper-beam! Charizard, Flame-thrower!" Marth commanded pointing at half of the kitchen filled with the tea. The two attacks ended up destroying not just the tea, but the kitchen, too. Marth got out of the remains of the kitchen just in time as the two Pokémon started fighting again.

Ghirahim decided to use the shampoo, instead of chasing Marth. 'When I use this shampoo I will be way more fabulous than Marth.' Ghirahim thought. He didn't know it was a rip-off.

Seeing his chance with Peach still unconscious, Marth moved as fast as he could with Link on his back away into the hallway and didn't notice Squirtle hiding around the next corner. As soon as Marth passed, Squirtle used water gun soaking Marth and Link. From the sudden surprise attack, Link lost his grip and Marth managed to pry him off. Marth dashed away, leaving Link behind who tried to keep up with the prince, but failed.

Sheik entered the mansion, wondering what Kyle and Oscar waited for at the entrance. Two bags were filled with shirts, one with Jewelry she stole for no reason and the rest of the bags were filled with scarfs. About halfway across the room, she bumped into a drenched Marth.

"Hi Sheik!"

"Hi Marth! What happened to you?"

"Long story. You really wanna know?"

"Yep"

"Peach and Ghirahim try to kill me, Jason threw Pokeballs at me, Charizard and Rayquaza are fighting over me, Squirtle soaked me and Link is obsessed with shiny things and tries to steal my crown. What's up with all the bags?"

"Went shopping. Here, I got some of those shirts with cute Pokémon on them." She handed Marth the two bags full of shirts. "And this" Sheik said giving Marth the bag of Jewelry "will fix your Link problem."

"Thanks. I really don't want to give Link piggy back rides anymore."

"Piggy back rides?" Sheik chuckled.

"Link was clinging to me like a monkey on a tree!" Marth exclaimed. Sheik burst out laughing imaging the scene in her mind and Marth had to laugh, too.

But their laughter was interrupted by a certain someone, exclaiming "Shiny!" and coming towards them.

"Oh boy, it's Link!" Marth groaned. "Use the jewelry" Sheik commanded. Marth pulled out a diamond necklace from the bag holding it in front of him. Link halted in front of Marth and stared at the necklace with a big smile. Marth chucked the necklace in another room. Link immediately darted after the jewelry.

"Well, I'll put these away" Sheik announced walking off towards her room.

"And I will try to avoid Peach" Marth said going into the hallway leading to the stairs to the second floor, bags in hand.

Meta Knight paced back and forth in his 'den'. He found an empty room that was never used and kept the smashers he kidnapped in there. So far, only Luigi occupied the room tied up, along with Meta Knight. He had already tried to drag Bowser and Fox, still passed out, into the room, but they are too heavy. Meta Knight tried to think of someone to kidnap, he could actually get into the room.

Marth calmly walked through the hallway towards the stairs. He hoped he had lost Peach for a while. Short before the stairs, the prince passed a door. A second after he passed Roy shot out, bawling "Spank!" Marth yelped and leapt forward making the redhead miss by a centimeter. Roy cursed and crashed into the opposite wall.

Marth rushed up the stairs at high speed and slid down the wall in hallway with all the rooms of the smashers. 'I should put this away' Marth thought looking at the three bags in the hand. He entered his shared room and threw the bags on his bed, stuffing some jewelry in his pocket in case of Link. The prince shared the room with Roy and Ike. Link always came in at night claiming that, in case of a pillow fight, he didn't want to miss out and wanted to be with his friends before dragging his blanket and pillow into the bathroom, settling down to sleep in the bath tub. The first time, nobody heard him, so Marth learned of Link's existence in the bathroom the hard way. As Marth got up to go to the toilet that certain morning, he didn't notice Link in green pajamas. When Marth pulled his pants down, he saw too late Link had woke up and stared at a personal part. Both screamed, Marth insulting Link while pulling frantically his pants up. After that Ike and Roy woke up to find Marth bolting out of the bathroom and swearing and Link trailing after him trying to apologize. After a few days Link kept on moving to their room until they gave up on shooing him out. Or in Marth's case getting annoyed and locking him out. But Link found a way in, anyway. Ever since, they wake Link up and kick him out before using the bathroom.

Marth stuck his head out of the hallway to check for Peach, Link or Roy. Seeing nobody in the hallway, Marth deemed it safe. Short before the stairs, Marth ran into Ike.

"Hiiiiii" Ike was smirking like crazy.

'Odd' Marth thought "Hi Ike, you look very happy."

"That's, cuz I met you, babe. Man, you look hot!"

"Ike" Marth looked pissed "You know I'm a guy. What hell is wrong with you!?"

"Nothing. I know you're a guy. A sexy one"

"Ike, are you HORNY?" Marth realized something "Please don't tell me you had any tea"

"Tea? Oh yeah I had a couple of cups. It actually tastes good! Wanna go on a date with me?" Ike tried his utter most to show all his muscles, but it looked like he had crapped his pants and tried desperately to hide it.

"Aww, NO!" Poor Marth was banging his head on a wall now. Marth stopped and turned towards Ike now. "Please move aside"

"No. I want you too badly and I know what is going to convince you of my sexiness."

"Ike, you're-"Before Marth could finish his sentence Ike had pulled him close and pressed his lips onto Marth's. Marth got mad. Really, really MAD. He pushed Ike away, swung his fist and punched the mercenary square in the face, sending Ike staggering backwards across the hallway.

Shocked, Ike held bleeding nose.

"What the hell, Ike!? DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" Marth yelled, wiping his mouth and spitting on the floor.

"Oh, I see how this is." Ike grumbled.

"How, what is!?"

"You're playing hard to get, pretty."

"No, idiot, I'm not playing anything!"

"You want it the hard way. I can give you the hard way and I will." Ike was smirking now.

Marth was frustrated. Ike didn't get anything he said and now Ike won't stop until he actually nailed Marth. So, since talking sense into Ike didn't work, Marth dashed past Ike and rushed down the stairs. Ike tried to catch him, but was too slow.

Marth stopped to catch his breath in the entrance hall. The prince thought he would finally find some peace before his icy blue eyes met Peach's blue eye, who was running right at him from outside. Kyle and Oscar tensed up, ready to swing baseball bats right at Peach's face. Kyle and Oscar swung out and the bats connected to the princess's face. Peach, without noticing, snapped the bats in half with her face and stormed at Marth, who had his mouth hanging open. Marth spun around and ran off, dodging a vicious slash at his stomach.

"What the fuck!?" Kyle yelled, looking helplessly at the broken bat.

Oscar was speechless and looked like he had grown two more arms suddenly and twitched with his eyes.

Snake was hiding under his box under all the rubble, pouring out manly tears about his crappy day. He didn't even have any cigarettes anymore to smoke.

Peach chased Marth down the hallway in front of the room where Yoshi was hording eggs in. Marth came to halt when Ike came from the other side of the hallway, grinning. To Marth's dismay Link jogged up next to Ike, eyes fixed on the tiara and diamond necklace clutched in one hand. Roy halted next to Peach determined on spanking Marth. Pikachu had gotten tired of biting unconscious smashers and set his eyes on Marth in hallway, growling ferociously. Ghirahim had figured out that the shampoo didn't do anything for his hair. He popped up between Ike and Link, charging magic. Marth looked right and left, but was surrounded from both sides from attackers. Toon Link and Samus joined the circle around Marth, too. Toon was getting frustrated that Marth kept on shuffling around, so he couldn't aim. Marth thought about running in between gaps, but decided against it. If they caught him he was doomed. Marth started to panic as the group drew closer. Glancing behind him he caught sight of the door.

Yoshi happily looked at his eggs that filled the whole room up to the ceiling.

Marth whipped around, figuring he would escape through the room and jump out a window to escape. As soon the prince pushed on the door handle, the door busted open and Yoshi's eggs rolled out sweeping up everybody in an egg tsunami. Ghirahim teleported away, while everybody else tried to get out of the egg river. The eggs rolled down the stairs and yelps could be heard from victims, trying not to get smashed by the many eggs. After a couple of hallways, some rooms, the eggs slowed down and gradually stopped rolling in front of the entrance of the mansion.

Yoshi sat in the room, crying. All his eggs rolled away! And he just managed to fill the room. Blaming Marth for his loss, he curled up and continued to weep.

Mart popped up from a pile of eggs. Scanning the room, he found Peach, Link, Samus, Toon Link and Pikachu unconscious. Pushing the eggs away, he noticed Roy too late. The red head slammed his hand on Marth's ass, making him yelp and turn around, rubbing his hurting behind. Marth glared at Roy. Roy was overjoyed. He was even so happy that he was on his knees shouting "Yes! Finally!" Seeing Marth's murderous glare he jumped up and ran as fast as his legs could carry him away from Marth. That wasn't far. Marth, being faster than Roy swiftly ran in front of Roy and punched the red head in the face knocking him out.

'Finally everybody is knocked out, so they will leave me alone! ... Hold on, where is Ike?' Marth thought looking around the room.

His question was answered as Ike stepped right in front of him and quickly slung a protesting Marth over his shoulder. Ike grit his teeth and started towards their room no matter how much Marth yelled, screamed, kicked, punched, and insulted him.

Arriving at they're room, Marth was still protesting, Ike kicked the door open, turned around and kicked it shut.

For the twentieth time Marth screamed "IKE! STOP! Let me down or I swear I will kill you and shove Falchion right up your frigging ass!"

Ike, unfazed by Marth's threats, threw Marth on the bed and quickly pinned him down. Marth struggled, but only got more tired from all the day's events.

"I told you I would give you the hard way" Ike said smirking and tying Marth's wrist with a rope he snatched before he encountered the prince the second time.

"You're so lucky I don't have Falchion in my hands now" Marth seethed, glaring and tried to make a fuss as much as possible, while being squished by Ike.

Ike had smug grin plastered on his face, finishing tying Marth's wrists. His smug fell, when Ike realised, he didn't pull Marth's shirt off before tying the prince's wrists.

"Darn…" Ike muttered, looking around the room for something sharp. His eyes settled on scissors on the nightstand next to him.

"Ike, what are you doing?" Marth asked, as he watched Ike grab the scissors.

Ike didn't answer and, instead started to cut Marth's shirt. Marth frantically tried to wiggle away, but got nowhere, since Ike still sat on him concentrating on not cutting Marth.

"There, better!" Ike proudly announced chugging the wrecked shirt in a corner.

"Ike, you son of-"Marth was silenced when Ike kissed him ferociously and started biting Marth on the neck. Marth tried to knee Ike the whole time, but being barely able to move, because of Ike on top of him, it didn't work. What Ike didn't notice, was Marth playing with the rope, slowly loosening it. Ike tied it crappy in his hurry. Ike grinned as moved his hands wandering to Marth's pants undoing them and pushing them down. Just before Ike could start, the rope slid off Marth's wrist. Since Ike was sitting, Marth had room to move. Ike sprang back as Marth's fist shot out and punched a big hole in Ike's bed all the way through, sending wood chips in the air.

"You are _SO DEAD IKE_!" Marth growled darkly, sending fear down Ike's spine. But Ike still wanted to do it with Marth, so he acted like he wasn't scared. Marth quickly pulled his pants back up, while he could and got off Ike's bed inching closer to Falchion, leaning on the wall by Marth's bed close to Ike. Ike decided he would be worse of if Marth got Falchion. Dashing for Falchion Ike grabbed it and got smashed in the wall by Marth. Marth wrestled Ike's grip off Falchion and sharply kneed Ike. Ike clutched his groin and sank on his knees. Marth panting from running all day for his life, then proceeded to beat the shit out of Ike making him cry in pain. Ike was lying motionless on the ground with several bruises, wound and broken bones. The wall suffered an Ike dent. Marth dusted himself off, snatched up Falchion and exited the room.

Peach's eyes fluttered open, one hand clutching the knife. Scanning the room, the princess couldn't see Marth anywhere and darted through the mansion and abruptly stopped at a window, seeing Marth exiting the building.

Outside Marth headed for the forest. 'I should find a good place to hide in the forest until the tea wears off' Math thought. But his path was blocked when Ghirahim appeared. He still didn't found out that the shampoo was a rip-of and didn't do anything for his hair, but wanted to kill Marth since he wanted to be the most fabulous NOW. Ghirahim started attacking Marth furiously with punches and magic attacks, which Marth blocked or dodged. Only after a minute the fight started, Peach joined slashing her knife at Marth.

"But, Brother! Let's go back to the Park! I'm sure the smashers are fine for a few days alone! They are probably only smashing the place or killing each other! It's fine!" Crazy Hand said, floating alongside his brother.

"FINE!? Crazy, I have a bad feeling about this we need to go back and check. Sorry that you couldn't try every ride in the Amusement Park." Master Hand answered.

Marth had fought with Peach and Ghirahim for 20 minutes. Panting, he barely dodged a kick from Ghirahim. Marth's body was aching from fighting and running all day and was covered in cuts from Peach. One time one of Ghirahim's magic attacks grazed his side. Marth backed up bumping against a tree. The prince ducked away from Peach's stab, which got the knife stuck in trunk.

"But I'm telling you, they are fine!" Crazy Hand argued.

"We will check now. We are there in a minute and when everything is fine we can go back, okay? NOW SHUT UP, CRAZY!" Master Hand bellowed.

Just when the hands arrived at the mansion, an explosion from the first floor spewed out from the side of the building where once the large living room was. To their Master Hand's horror he witnessed the explosion, everybody seemingly nuts AND Marth being brutally attacked by Ghirahim and Peach. "See, I told you everything is fine brother. Oh, lookie! Marth, Peach and Ghirahim are playing together!" Crazy Hand chirped. Master Hand twitched violently before rushing to Marth to aid him.

Marth was continuously cursing now, blocked another slash from Peach. His eyes shone, when he saw Master Hand rushing in and knocking out Ghirahim, before the demon could teleport away. Dodging, Marth slowly closed the gap between him and Peach and quickly snatched the knife out of her grip. Peach froze and snarled, seeing her weapon gone from her hands. Without warning, she leapt at poor, tired Marth and began choking him. Master Hand picked up Peach, holding her suspended in the air, while Marth wheezed, getting air back in his lungs.

"Thank you, Master Hand" Marth said.

Knocking Peach out, Master Hand asked enraged "WHAT IS GOING ON!?"

"The Smashers drank tea Peach bought and something was wrong with it. Everybody went nuts except Kyle, Oscar and me" Marth explained hoping Master Hand wouldn't blame him in anger for the chaos.

"Okay… "Master Hand murmured "How long do you think the effects will hold?"

"No idea. Maybe longer?" Marth suggested.

"Okay. Here's the plan: We knock them out, lock them up and wait. And Marth, I suggest you tend to your wounds, before you start." Master Hand announced.

"I'm fine" Marth said.

While Master Hand had declared his plan, Kyle and Oscar had entered the scene and stared at the unconscious Peach. "We wanted to do that!" both complained at the same time.

"Crazy Hand, get Peach and Ghirahim and lock them in a room" Master Hand instructed and tried to ignore the sound of sound of a shattering window.

Turning to Kyle and Oscar, who were complaining to themselves that their day was crap and that it wasn't them who hurt Marth, the giant glove yelled "Shut up and quit complaining! Now move your asses and follow the plan!" Both huffed annoyed, Kyle trudging back to the mansion, while Oscar teleported.

"Wheee!" Crazy Hand zoomed out of the forest, holding Donkey Kong, who was seeing stars and bananas now.

"My brother is an idiot" Master Hand muttered and spun around "Marth, take it ea-sy…" Now, if Master Hand would have eyes, he would have blinked at the empty spot where Marth once was. The prince had already ran off putting the plan in action.

**Chapter 4! :D and it's so much longer than the others… anyway I hope you like it! And thanks' JGT-298 for the review, it made my day ****. **


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Mission Chaotic

Marth checked the entrance hall for egg tsunami victims, but found it deserted.

Somewhere else in the room where Pit is hugging the ceiling, Kyle and Oscar stared up at him.

"How do we get him down?" Oscar asked.

"I got this" Kyle said and changed into his shadow dragon form. As dragon Kyle was bigger and able to reach Pit. Before Kyle grabbed Pit, Pit fell and landed on Kyle's snout. The angel clung to the snout, while Kyle tried to pry him off without slashing him open with his sharp claws.

"Gesh ufsh shupd kid!" Kyle tried to yell, his tail swinging wildly making Oscar teleport out of the way constantly.

"STOP SWISHING YOUR TAIL!" Oscar screamed and before he could teleport was bitch slapped right in his face and flung across the room from the tail.

Kyle finally pried Pit off and flung him against the wall, knocking him unconscious.

"Watch out!" Oscar yelled his eyes on Toon Link releasing an arrow at Kyle's giant dragon behind. Kyle's eyes whipped around, eyes huge. His body shifted and the arrow missed the target instead hitting his balls. Kyle roared in pain and narrowed his eyes on Toon Link. "Ew" Oscar muttered. Toon Link tried to flee, but was promptly charred by Kyle's flames.

"I guess we lock them up?" Oscar inquired dragging Pit by a wing, because carrying him would be nice and Oscar despised being nice. Kyle only huffed and snarled at Toon Link as he held him up by his burned clothing, starting towards the room where the smashers on tea were kept.

"I take that as yes" Oscar said to himself following Kyle.

Oscar opened the door to the aforementioned room and dragged Pit in.

Kyle flicked Toon Link away like some pesky little insect, which Toon Link in his opinion was. With a small high pitched "Eep" Toon Link slowly slid down the wall. Kyle transformed back and turned to Oscar. "Come on, we gonna get the arrow out in our room." Kyle muttered, walking rigidly to their quarters, Oscar following.

Marth and Roy circled each other, gazes locked together like two wild animals, each daring the other to make a move. Roy had popped up halfway across the entrance hall determined to repeat his list. Somewhere he had found a long flexible ruler and a leather belt as spanking weapons.

"You gonna get spanked Marthy, you can give up now." Roy growled.

"You wish" Marth spat back, Falchion in hand.

After two more minutes of circling, Roy lunged at Marth, whipping the belt at Marth. Marth back flipped. Roy immediately darted around Marth aiming with the ruler at the prince's behind. Marth twisted backwards blocking the ruler and turning around slowly pushing Roy away. "Give up, Roy?" Marth asked, smirking "Nope" Roy answered lashing out with the belt. Marth jumped back and dashed at Roy, cutting the ruler clean in half. Backing away, Roy growled in frustration. Both started circling each other again, Roy trying to get behind Marth.

Roy smirked as an idea hit him. He ran straight at Marth, pulling back the belt as he passed Marth. Marth immediately swung out with Falchion to cut the belt in half, but abruptly stopped and pulled back Falchion, when Roy moved his arm in the way, so he wouldn't cut through Roy's arm. Seeing his chance Roy lashed out with the belt. The belt connected with poor Marth's ass making Marth jump and yell in pain.

"Gotcha!" Roy smirked watching Marth rubbing his behind for the second time that day.

Roy swung around and prepared to run to find other victims on his list. As soon as Roy turned around, Marth dashed at him with lightning speed. Roy whipped around and lashed out with the belt that wrapped itself around Falchion.

"Can't knock me out now, without Falchion, hmm? What'ya gonna do now?" Roy asked smiling smugly and inching even closer to Marth's face. "Who says I need Falchion to knock you out?" Marth replied smugly, rearing back his fist, while Roy's smile faded. "Oh, shit" Roy said before Marth's fist connected with his face, knocking him out. Marth sheathed Falchion and slung Roy over his shoulder making his way to the room. After locking up Roy Marth scouted out the hallway with everybody's room, walking past Kyle and Oscar's room, he heard conversation. He wanted to walk past, but curiosity got the best of him as the prince slowly leaned onto the door.

"Yikes! That's a lot of blood" Oscar muttered

"OSCAR! Get on with it, pull it out!" Kyle shouted.

"You sure you ready? You know, this is really gonna hurt your… umm, balls, you know?" Oscar answered.

Marth's face was starting to turn green. This sounded very wrong and Marth felt like vomiting at the thought.

"Oscar, hu-" Kyle's went wide as Oscar yanked out the arrow. "OW!"

"There! It's out" Oscar said approaching the door, arrow in hand, while Kyle took care of the wound.

Marth was so grossed out, that he didn't realize the doorknob turning and face planted on the floor into the room when Oscar opened the door.

"Did you eavesdrop!?" Oscar shouted. Marth got up, his eyes wandering to the arrow, then to Kyle. He kept on looking back and forth.

"Toon Link" Oscar stated "What did you think we did?"

"Umm… I…I-I have to go look for more smashers!" Marth uttered and quickly ran off with a beet red face from embarrassment.

Kyle and Oscar stared at the vacant spot where Marth was for a few minutes.

"Wanna check outside?" Kyle asked.

"Yeah" Oscar agreed and teleported outside.

Kyle slowly started his way down. Outside, Oscar was waiting leaning against a wall.

"Would it kill you for once to walk instead of teleporting ahead?" Kyle asked glaring at Oscar.

"No, but I don't feel like walking today." Oscar answered.

Suddenly Ness and Lucas raced by screaming something about Captain Flacon, speedos and their eyes burn. Kyle and Oscar heard Captain Falcon and crouched down behind a bush. The F- Zero racer was putting a little fence around a flower assuring it that the beauty of nature shall not be trampled.

Marth was checking outside, too when he spotted two familiar figures hiding in a bush. "Why are you hiding in a bush?" Marth asked.

"Because, we don't want to see C. Falcon in speedos." Oscar answered.

"Exactly" Kyle agreed "and that's why you will go knock him out."

"No!" Marth retorted, but Kyle and Oscar shoved him forward. Upon hearing C. Falcon's voice Marth spun around glaring viciously at Kyle and Oscar. 'Do it' Kyle mouthed. Marth shook his head mouthing 'No' back. 'Pansy' Oscar whispered standing up. Marth getting angry picked up a large rock beside him and threw it with all his anger at Oscar's face. Oscar ducked at the incoming rock. The rock bounced off the wall behind him, leaving a small dent and shot back at Marth. Marth ducked and the rock knocked out Captain Falcon hitting him in the head. All three had their mouth open from witnessing the strength of the throw. After a minute, Oscar piped up, shouting at Marth "Did you try to kill me!?"

"You tried to kill me plenty of times before!" Marth yelled back.

"And when was that, princess?" Oscar sneered.

"Like the time you said you wanted to try shooting a bow outside aimed at me instead of the tree and said you have bad aim, which is a lie!" Marth threw back.

"He didn't hit you, so you are fine!" Kyle scoffed.

"Or the time YOU" Marth exclaimed pointing at Kyle "nearly drowned me in the pool, saying you couldn't swim and needed to hold on to me, pushing me down. And I know, you CAN swim!" Marth screamed.

"Oh come on, then we dunked you a bit underwater, that's nothing!" Oscar said.

"Oh, Yeah!? So, apparently, it was NOTHING when we had the shooting the apple off your partners head contest and you picked me and aimed low at my face!?" Marth shouted.

"So?" Oscar mocked. "Anyway, we should get C. Falcon to the room."

Master Hand popped up "Oh hi, you three! Wow, you guys teamed up?"

"No!" all three said at the same time.

"Why don't you? I know, Marth, they aren't your friends, but all three of you are beat up and it will be faster and easier. "

"Fine" Marth muttered "but only to get this done faster."

"Good!" Master Hand said cheerfully and picked up Captain Falcon, shouting "No! He's wearing speedos!" and floated away.

"Where should we check next?" Kyle asked.

"Cafeteria" Marth answered, already walking towards the entrance. Kyle and Oscar followed.

"Nana, we did!"

"Let's turn it on, Popo!"

The Ice Climbers turned the cooler as high as possible, high-fiving each other.

The trio arrived at the cafeteria. Inside the cafeteria a drunk Lucario searched for more booze. Luigi looked around to find something to burn. Jason had woken up and threw Pokeballs at Luigi. Luigi found a bread crumb and burned it ignoring the Pokeballs.

"I will take care of Jason" Marth said.

"Lucario" Kyle said transforming into a dragon.

"Luigi" Oscar said teleporting behind the plumber and knocked him out with magic. "That was easy."

"Hey Jason!" Marth called. Jason turned around immediately hurling Pokeballs at Marth. Marth ignored the pain as one of the many Pokeballs smacked on his crotch and caught one, throwing it back at Jason. The Pokémon Trainer stepped out of harm's way, remembering last time. Marth took out Falchion, hitting the Pokeballs back, while Jason dodged. It almost looked like Tennis practice.

Oscar looked over to Kyle and Lucario. Lucario was clinging to walls to avoided Kyle's swipes with claws and tail at him. Kyle was getting annoyed now and snapped with his jaws at him. Right at the moment the jaws were open the widest, Lucario had to throw up. It landed right in Kyle's mouth. Everything seemed to freeze. Marth had knocked out Jason and stared with Oscar wide eyed at the scene. Oscar teleported next to Kyle, wanting check if he was okay. Kyle twitched, disgust written all over his face and turned his head, not noticing Oscar, and puked right on top of the demon. Marth erupted in laughter, watching his two enemies. Kyle snapped at Lucario stumbling away catching the end of his tail and threw him against the opposite wall, knocking him out. Transforming back he glared at Marth rolling on the floor laughing his ass off.

"STOP LAUGHING AT US! Get Lucario, Luigi and Jason locked up!" Kyle angrily yelled at Marth. "I will be in my room washing my mouth" he muttered. Oscar wiped puke away from his eyes teleporting to his and Kyle's room to shower. Marth rolled ten minutes on the floor tears started to form and sides aching from laughing so hard.

"Well, I guess I should get this three where they should be" Marth said to himself while giggling. As soon as he stood up he saw a problem. He could take two at a time, but that would leave the third and if the one left would wake up while Marth wasn't there, they would have to knock him out again. A smile spread across Marth's face as an idea popped in his mind.

"Rayquaza! Charizard!" Both Pokémon crashed in snapping at each other's throat. "LISTEN" Marth yelled so loud that the two stopped and looked at him waiting for a command.

"Charizard, pick up Luigi and follow me. Rayquaza, pick up Lucario and follow me" Marth instructed. Both Pokémon obeyed following Marth with Jason slung over his shoulder to the room.

Marth sighed slumping against the wall beside Kyle and Oscar's room. They had been in there for 20 minutes and Marth wanted to get the tea disaster behind him and enjoy some peace. At last the two exited the room.

"I think there was another smasher!" Oscar argued.

"There was Pit and Toon Link and they are knocked out!" Kyle argued back.

Marth didn't know what the argument was about, but didn't want to get involved.

"I'm sure I saw something blue on the ceiling…" Oscar muttered.

Kyle eyes seemed to widen as he remembered something blue, stuck to the ceiling and bleeding; looking awfully like Sonic. "Oscar?" "Yeah?" "That was Sonic stuck in the ceiling" "Oh… well, let's go get him"

Kyle looked down at Marth, turning to go "Get up, princess"

Marth really wanted to swear at him, but instead stuck out his leg watching Kyle trip and face plant on the floor, smirking. Kyle glared at the prince, getting up. "One day, I will get you." Kyle threatened, before walking off, Oscar following. Marth stood up and started after them, complaining silently that he had to team up with those two. Getting Sonic off the ceiling was easier. The hedgehog had fallen asleep. Probably from lack of movement. The only thing Kyle had to evade while yanking him out was the drool slipping out of Sonic's mouth.

"Okay, where do we go next?" Oscar asked shutting the door after Kyle threw in Sonic.

Marth was rubbing his arms, trying to get warm "Guys, are you getting cold, too?"

"Actually, yeah. Isn't the cooler broken, though?" Kyle asked, noticing the chilling cold, too.

"Maybe after drinking tea somebody felt like fixing it… someone who likes the cold…" Oscar mumbled trying to keep warm.

"Come, let's go, maybe they are still by the cooler!" Marth called, sprinting down the hallway. With 'they' Oscar and Kyle knew Marth meant the Ice Climbers. Those two really loved the cold. Oscar teleported to the room where the culprit should be to prevent them from leaving. Arriving in the doorway, he saw the two coming towards him. Oscar's eyes doubled in size. The whole room was already covered in ice and icicles hanging off the ceiling. It looked like a huge freezer.

"Isn't it beautiful, Oscar?" Nana chirped.

Before Oscar could answer something blue whizzed by, slipped and landed on his behind with an "Ow" on the ice. Two seconds later Kyle poked his head in laughing at Marth. Oscar smirked and Kyle had tears in his eyes from laughing as they watched Marth getting up and slipping again and again, telling Kyle to shut up in between "Ow"s. the prince looked like Bambi in the movie.

Nana giggled before turning to Oscar "Umm… could you let us past, please?" Marth had by now slipped his way to the cooler, literally, and shut it off. Popo cried out in shock and jumped on Marth, assaulting him while shouting "Quick, Nana put it back on, the ice will melt!" Nana tried to run, but Oscar held her back on her hoodie. Kyle stepped forward revealing a baseball bat and knocked Nana out.

"Ow, Ow, Ow, OW!" Marth shouted. He was still being assaulted and constantly slipping, Marth couldn't get up. And he really didn't want to punch little Popo. Kyle sighed and stepped into the room, walking over to Marth under assault. Kyle didn't make it all the way. He slipped after two steps, face planting. Growling, Kyle tried to get up again, but didn't fare any better than Marth. He looked like Bambi on ice, too. Oscar sighed hearing Kyle swear like no tomorrow and Marth nonstop 'Ow'. He teleported next to the bat, picked it up, teleported next to Marth and Popo, aimed at Popo and missed hitting Marth in the face probably breaking Marth's nose. "OW! OSCAR YOU MORON!" Marth yelled, clutching his nose and curled up, wanting the day to end. Kyle grinned like a retard from his spot. He had given up standing and was lying on his stomach watching the scene. Oscar smirked, before disappearing and appearing behind Popo, who was about to start the cooler again, knocking him out quickly.

The two Ice Climbers out in the hall, Oscar turned to Kyle and Marth, still on the ice. "Get up and come."

"Excuse me, Sherlock, but there is still ice. It takes time to melt, you know" Kyle snapped back.

"Well, then transform to dragon and melt the ice or something" Oscar huffed.

"Fine" Kyle snorted and transformed. Due to his size, all Kyle had to do, after his size wrecked the wall, was to step forward to get off the slippery surface. Kyle off the ice, still transformed, Oscar impatiently yelled at Marth "Get your ass off the ice!"

Marth finding some peace at just lying at the cool surface flipped Oscar the bird. Oscar muttered some really bad insults at Marth before turning to Kyle "Hey, could you get the faggot-"An ice chunk hit his head "HEY!" the demon spun around hatred filled eyes directed at Marth.

"Yeah, I got an idea" Kyle said and stretched his tail towards Marth, slinging it around the prince's arm. With a sudden yank and a yelp from Marth, the teen was flung out of the room rolling to a harsh stop just before hitting the wall.

_Somewhere in a town…_

The toxic, air polluting smoke from terrible, terrible farts hung in the air, suffocating crying and screaming people. Another reason why the people screamed, except from the horrendous Wario farts, was Crazy Hand laughing like a maniac and zooming around, exclaiming "Tag is so much fun!"

_Back at the mansion_

"Finally, it's starting to get warm" Kyle said. Popo and Nana were locked up. While they took care of the kids, Master Hand had taken care of Bowser, Fox, Dedede, G&W, Diddy Kong, Olimar and Pikachu.

"Okay. We checked mainly everywhere. Where didn't we look yet? AND STOP GLARING AT ME MARTH!"

"NO! We didn't check everybody's room yet." Marth muttered, glowering at Oscar.

"FINE! LET'S DO IT, THEN!" Oscar roared, stomping off.

"Wow, he's actually walking today" Kyle commented, before accompanying a pissed off Oscar. Marth tagged along, glaring intensely at Oscar's back. The first room the trio checked was Samus' and Sheiks' room. Sheik was sitting cross legged, her gaze fixed on the mirror across her on the wall, while trying on scarfs. Zelda sat on Samus' bed, for no reason, crying. Depression mode. Marth poked his head in. He really didn't want to hit Sheik or Zelda; they didn't wreck anything anyway. He was about to close when Kyle shoved him forward sending the door flying open and Marth sprawled on the carpet.

"Hey shrimp, there are Sheik and Zelda." Kyle said staring at Marth standing up.

"Listen, they aren't doing anything, so let's just leave them" Marth whispered.

"Hi Marth, did the jewelry help?" Sheik asked trying on a fuzzy sky blue scarf, turning to look at Marth. "Are you hanging out with Kyle and Oscar?" Sheik was shocked. Marth never hung out with those two. Marth and Kyle hated each other's guts. Oscar and Marth hated each other's guts.

"The tea had some shit in it, everybody except us three is nuts and we have to knock everybody out" Oscar stated dryly. And stepped forward. On one of the scarfs. Big mistake. Sheik's eyes narrowed in rage and flung a handful of needles at Oscar. Oscar teleported out of the way and reappeared behind the enraged Sheik. All this time Zelda huddled against the wall on the bed and kept on crying.

Marth jumped in front of Zelda blocking knives flying at her. Sheik didn't aim at her; Oscar sometimes appeared in front of Zelda.

"Oscar, you idiot! That could have hit Zelda" Marth yelled using himself as meat shield for Zelda.

"Then be her knight in shining armour, dumbass!" Oscar yelled back. Kyle blocked the doorway. As Sheik sped past, Kyle stuck out his leg, sending Sheik, flying and landing with a_ thud_. Oscar used the chance and send a powerful shadow ball at her knocking her out. A few things in the room were broken and Kyle and Marth pulled some needles out of themselves, while Oscar wrenched a knife out of his shoulder he ignored during the fight.

"What about her" Kyle asked glancing at Zelda. The princess had Marth in a tight embrace, still crying, while Marth tried to gently push her off.

"How about we lock the door and close the window?" Marth offered, while he tried to untangle himself, which made Zelda only squeeze tighter.

"Sure" Kyle agreed, taking care of the window. Oscar helped Marth untangling himself from Zelda, while both of them glared at each other viciously.

After locking up Zelda, Kyle slid down the wall, sitting down.

"Get up lazy" Oscar said. Now Marth sat down "Oscar just carry her over the shoulder or bridal style and teleport her into the room and teleport back. You can carry one person and teleport, right?" Marth asked, this time not glaring.

"Yeah" Oscar answered, slinging Sheik over his shoulder.

"Oh, and Oscar?" Marth looked at him with icy eyes "if you hurt her or drag by her clothes or some shit like that, I swear, I will break all your bones, stomp you in the dirt and make minced meat out of you with Falchion. Got It?" Marth said 'Got it?" with so much threat in his tone, that Oscar had to try very hard not to flinch and quickly teleported away with Sheik over his shoulder.

"Did you mean that?" Kyle asked, feeling kind of retarded after asking since he knew Marth was protective of his friends and he hated Oscar.

"Yup, and if you try to help him or team up against me with him I will do the same to you." Marth answered with no emotion on his face, intimidating Kyle.

"I'm back, get off your asses" the rude remark signaled that Oscar was back and Marth felt like shoving a stick up the demon's ass. The next three rooms turned out empty, but out of the next one came a horrid screeching. All three covered their ears, before Kyle kicked down the door with a "What the hell!?" Falco sat in his open window, still acting like a rooster. Since Kyle had a bad day he yelled "SHUT UP!" and punched the avian out the window. Falco landed with a _thud_ and a _crack._

"Oh shit, do I get kicked out when I kill someone?" Kyle exclaimed. "Go check on him Oscar!"

Without a word Oscar vanished, appearing next to Falco, kicked him in the side and gave a thumbs up after hearing Falco moan. Marth was hitting his head against the wall, repeatedly mumbling "Surrounded by morons". Now if a wall had feeling or something, it'd be crying now and asking what it did to Marth to deserve this.

"Harder" Kyle said watching Marth.

"What!?" Marth growled.

"I said harder, dolt, if you hit harder you could crack you skull" Kyle responded.

Marth's eye twitched, before he lunged at Kyle and the two started rolling on the floor strangling each other.

"I took care of the oversized pigeon guy" Oscar declared, before he started cheering for Kyle. After a few minutes, the three heard Master Hand passing by mumbling something about Crazy Hand and immediately stopped, so they wouldn't get in trouble. As soon as they exited the room, Master Hand turned to the three "Hi, have you seen Crazy Hand?"

"Nope" the trio said in unison.

"Hmm… where could he be?" Master Hand mumbled, floating off.

As Master Hand wandered the wrecked mansion, he was jolted out of his deep thoughts, by the TV. Someone left on the TV and the news were on. The reporter babbled about a toxic threat as the camera showed from a distance, a town covered in green clouds of Wario farts where Crazy Hands' laughter could be heard along with screaming and crying. Master Hand zipped out of the mansion to the town. The next few rooms showed to be deserted, too. In front of Marth's, Ike's and Roy' room they could hear laughter and tinkling of jewelry.

What is going on?" Kyle mumbled. They pushed the door open a bit like some monster could lurk in there and poked their heads in. Ike wasn't on the floor anymore. The noise came from the bathroom. With a quick glance at his bed, Marth noticed the bag of jewelry gone. All three stumbled into the bathroom, because all of them wanted to go in at the same time to see Link sitting in the bathtub, laughing and playing with the jewelry.

"How about we just lock him in here?" Oscar whispered. Marth nodded while Kyle whispered back "Agreed" Link turned to look at Kyle, Oscar and Marth, his eyes resting on the ever so sparkly tiara. "Shiny" Link said in a creepy possessed voice dropping all the necklaces and rings in his hands, slowly getting out of the bath tub like some wolf about to lunge at its prey. He looked like a creep.

"No, Link! Play with shiny in bathtub" Marth said sternly, backing out of the bathroom along with Kyle and Oscar. Right in front of the door, they bolted out, Link lunged screeching "Shiny!" and Kyle slammed the door shut, locking it. The door rattled as Link slammed into the door, starting to claw at it muttering 'shiny'. All three panted watching the door. Link's clawing and "shiny" died down and tingling noise started again as Link resumed playing with the jewelry in the bathtub.

_Somewhere in a dark room…_

"NOOOOO! My only captive, GONE!" Meta Knight howled, eyes fixed on Luigi's spot, a lonely rope left behind.

"I can help you with your problem" a voice echoed out of a dark corner. But then the person choked, yelling "Stupid dust!"

"Who is there? Show yourself!" Meta Knight yelled, although it wasn't necessary in the small room and because the person in the corner yelled.

"It's Ike, puffball" Ike yelled for no reason and stepped into the dim light of the flickering light bulb.

"How can you help me?" Meta Knight asked.

"Well, there is a person I'm trying to find and obviously you are getting nowhere."

"Okay, you can be my student"

"Acquaintance"

"Student!"

"Acquaintance!"

"STUDENT!"

"ACQUAINTANCE! NOW SHUT UP OR I WILL BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF YOU!" Ike angrily shouted.

Meta Knight considered this before nodding "Okay we shall go"

"Hold on, one more thing" Ike aid standing right in front of Meta Knight. With a smirk, Ike lunged at a surprised Meta Knight, determined to make out.

"Geez, where IS everybody!" Ness complained. All of a sudden, it seemed like more and more smashers vanished, so the two boys couldn't find anybody to mess with. Lucas stayed quiet listening to Ness' ranting.

"Mario is locked up" Oscar announced. He'd just took care of Mario, while Marth and Kyle waited leaning against the wall. The rest of the bedrooms had been empty.

"Well, where should we go next?" Kyle asked.

Marth shrugged "How about we just wander through the mansion?"

"Sure" Oscar said. Marth caught a glimpse of pink and started to look past Oscar, leaning sideways.

"What?" Oscar snorted.

"Kirby is coming to us." Marth said pointing at the pink puffball. Kyle and Oscar turned around, and indeed Kirby trotted towards them wearing a white coat and carrying a medical kit.

"Poyo!" Kirby said before halting in front of the trio and shuffling around in his bag, pulling out a long, pointy needle filled with green dangerous looking liquid. "Poyo!" Kirby turned to them with big round eyes.

Kirby was calm, so Marth tried to talk to him "Hey Kirby, you know you really shouldn't play around with that, because you don't know how to handle that." Kirby stared at Marth. And stared. And stared. Then Kirby pointed his stubby arm at Math's arm, exclaiming "Poyo!" he still wanted to play doctor. Marth eyed the liquid in the syringe. It looked lethal. Kirby was getting frustrated with the "patients". Oscar and Kyle stood behind Marth doing nothing, except staring at him, just like Marth. With a war cry, Kirby leapt forward trying to stab Marth in the arm. Marth jumped back and kept on dodging Kirby's attempts of plunging the syringe in his skin and shot glances at Kyle and Oscar, who didn't get the message at all or ignored him. "Excuse me, idiots, but you have the baseball bat!" the prince shouted. Marth didn't use Falchion; he didn't want to end up cutting the little puffball on crack.

"Fine, I'm coming, brat!" Oscar snapped, snatching the baseball bat from Kyle. He didn't hurry. He didn't teleport. It agitated Marth, who was dodging constantly and just wanted his crappy day to finally end. Oscar smiled, seeing Marth upset. Taking his time getting behind Kirby, he turned to Kyle "Hey Kyle, you wanna hit the marshmallow?" Oscar asked knowing with every second he wasted, he annoyed Marth.

"Hmmm... Well, I think you should have the fun." Kyle answered back, smiling.

"GET ON WITH IT YOU BASTARDS!" Marth screamed furiously, wishing after Kirby was knocked out, that the two would spontaneously combust.

"Fine" Oscar said and swung out with the bat, but missed. This made Kirby angry. He didn't like it that Oscar interfered with his "difficult patient". Kirby puffed up hovering in the air for a second and transformed into a heavy pink block slamming down on Oscar's foot with a sickening _crunch._

Oscar's eyes narrowed and bit his lip, before screaming, dropping the bat and rapidly saying "Fuck" over and over again, hopping around one foot. Kyle picked up the bat and smashed it at Kirby and was dumbfounded. The bat formed a dent as Kirby was hit, but as the bat retracted, the dent filled back in and Kirby round as ever. And fuming. Kirby turned, anger etched onto his face. "Crap" Kyle muttered and dodged, trying to think of a way to deal with Kirby. Marth also tried to think of way to deal with Kirby after witnessing the scene; knocking out obviously didn't work. Kyle suddenly had an idea as a smirk crept on his face.

"Hey princess, distract puffball" Kyle shouted earning a glare from Marth at calling him princess. Although Marth really wanted to strangle Kyle now, he complied, getting Kirby's attention. While Marth dodged Kirby's stabs, Kyle turned into his shadow dragon form, his sides nearly touching the walls either side. With a roar, he got Kirby's attention, who stopped and stared wide eyed at the dragon, dropping the needle. Marth backed away and Oscar still hopped around filling the hallway with a lot of "Fuck"s. Kirby shivered in fear, as suddenly, Kyle's fat giant dragon arse loomed over the puffball and within seconds Kyle sat down. Marth looked horrified at the thought of small Kirby splattered all over the floor. "What did you do...?" Marth whispered, barely audible. Kyle finally lifted his behind after a few long seconds to reveal a flat, but not dead, paper thin Kirby. Kirby protested with a lot of "Poyo!"s, but the short words were ignored. Kyle had for some reason an envelope in his pocket, strode over to Kirby, folded him and stuffed him in the envelope, sealing it with a smirk plastered over his face. Marth just stared, frozen, not knowing what to do. Oscar finally ceased swearing and commented, limping over "I never knew your ass was so effective." A few seconds passed, Kyle still smirking, Oscar staring, and Marth blinking. Kyle was the first to move and handed Oscar the Kirby envelope and punched him for commenting about his ass. Oscar muttered an "Ow" and something along the lines of "it wasn't an insult" and teleported away.

"Come on, we have to find more smashers" Kyle said, striding down the hallway, Marth silently following.

_In Meta Knight's "den"…_

"Bastard" Meta Knight whispered, feeling extremely violated.

"Let's go!" Ike said, stretching, a smile glued on his face.

_Somewhere in a village…_

Master Hand was frozen in shock. Buildings crumbled, fire everywhere and the _sickening__**, **_**green CLOUDS OF WARIO WAFTS! **And his idiotic brother zipping around, laughing.

"CRAZY! Why didn't you do anything about this!?" Master H. shouted.

"Brother! Join us playing tag!" Crazy H. chased Wario on his bike.

"No Crazy!" Master H. quickly wanted to get away from the village, so he wouldn't be seen and had to pay the damage. He zapped Wario driving by which made the bike explode and Wario bounced against Master H., farting just as he touched the giant glove.

"EW!" Master H. screamed flicking Wario against a weak wall that collapsed upon impact.

"Crazy, pick up Wario"

"But he farts even when he's unconscious"

"DO IT"

"Okay, but I'm telling you bro, you missed all the fun!" Crazy Hand exclaimed, picking up Wario and floating away with Master Hand from the destroyed village.

_Back at the Mansion…_

"I honestly don't know how to do this without destroying vines…" Kyle mumbled, although he wouldn't mind hurting Ivysaur.

"Wolf's retarded" Oscar commented.

"You find everybody retarded!" Marth barked at Oscar.

Currently Kyle, Oscar and Marth tried to figure out what to do about Ivysaur and Wolf. Ivysaur was pretty simple, but none of the three felt like swinging themselves through the vines after a retarded looking Wolf.

"Hold on" Marth said, running off.

"Where do you think you going, brat?" Kyle asked, stepping on Marth's cape, making the prince face plant.

"You Idiot, I was going to get a Pokeball!" Marth yelled, standing up.

"Oh"

Marth turned to Oscar "Could go get a Pokeball, you'll be faster than me"

Oscar nodded teleporting away and was back 10 seconds holding a Pokeball. Just as Marth wanted to grab the Pokeball, Oscar pulled back, grin across his face "If you want this, you have to wear a dress for whole week in front of everyone" Marth grabbed for it again, but Oscar dodged. "Kyle catch!" Oscar shouted as Marth tackled him. Kyle caught it smirking "Want this princess?" "Give it to me RIGHT NOW!" Marth yelled lunging at Kyle, who threw it back to Oscar. Marth quickly back flipped to Oscar, but Oscar teleported. Kyle and Oscar laughed at him "If you want it you have to wear a dress for a week!" Kyle mocked. "NEVER! Stop it, that's not funny! And we still have to deal with Ivysaur and Wolf!" Marth bellowed, glaring at Kyle and Oscar. If looks could kill, Kyle and Oscar would've died right now.

_Outside the mansion…_

"Hmmm…"

"Bro!"

"Hmm…"

"Bro! Bro!"

"Crazy, shut up! I'm trying to think!" Master Hand yelled. The giant glove had been trying to find a solution with the Wario problem. Sticking Wario with the other unconscious smashers, would probably wreck their lungs and Master Hand really couldn't pay for medical bills now and Dr. Mario was on vacation. "Ah, I have it! Brother we need lots of rope!" Crazy Hand returned after a minute with rope. Master Hand tied Wario onto a large tree. The fat guy was still unconscious and farting horrendously, which made the tree wither.

_Back with Marth, Kyle and Oscar…_

Marth smiled looking at the thing behind Kyle and Oscar.

"What are you smiling about?" Oscar snapped. A deep angry growl answered behind. Rayquaza had heard Marth in distress after knocking out Charizard and nearly mauling him. Rayquaza sped to the mansion and snuck behind Kyle and Oscar. Rayquaza was very pissed, that his Master had been laughed at and angered. Kyle gulped. In a second Rayquaza snapped its' giant jaws at them missing by a mere inch, making Oscar drop the Pokeball. Marth snatched it up and allowed Rayquaza to chase and terrorize his enemies through the mansion.

Marth caught Ivysaur. Wolf yelped as he grabbed at nothing and smashed into a wall, toppling onto the floor. "Hold on, Kyle has the baseball bat… Oh well, I will just punch Wolf" Marth thought. Wolf had gotten off the floor, looking around the room for vines to swing in. Wolf had no idea what to do now. No vines. No swinging. Looking Wolf saw Marth coming towards him. Figuring that he was the cause of his "jungle" vanishing, he attacked Marth, startling the prince. Marth jumped to the side as Wolf lunged at him again.

Rayquaza had chased Kyle and Oscar to the cafeteria. In between Oscar ditched Kyle, but came back towards the end. Kyle was fed up now. Twitching with anger, he turned around, transformed and roared at Rayquaza. Rayquaza roared back before lunging at Kyle. Oscar stayed out of the dragon fight, having attained popcorn out of nowhere and was sitting on floor munching popcorn, while watching the fight. After a while Kyle won the fight, having knocked out Rayquaza, but Rayquaza had managed to break one of his arms. Changing back Kyle's arm hung limply at his side. Oscar had finished his popcorn and limped over to Kyle.

Instead of walking back, Oscar teleported them back to Marth. Marth and Wolf still, fought, although Marth dodged most of the time as his body complained about the shitty day.

"Hey, lazy bums, take care of Wolf!" Marth said flipping past the two and shoving them forward. Kyle didn't want to complete the task, stepping back and shoving Oscar forward along with the bat. Oscar quickly glared at Kyle and Marth, but before he even moved, a _thump _resounded through the room along with Ike's "I gotta make out with him later"

Ike stared at Wolf for a second before slinging him over his shoulder. Marth stood in the doorway wondering how Ike was walking normally after been beaten shitless by him. Ike froze as he tried to walk with Wolf and willed his knees not to buckle underneath him. 'I guess two heart containers wasn't enough' Ike thought, while Marth, Kyle, Oscar and Meta Knight, who stood beside him, stared at him.

_Flashback_

_Ike finally woke up. He actually wanted to fall back unconscious again to continue having sick fantasies, but the urge to try again with a certain peeved prince wouldn't let him. His body aching, Ike bravely crawled out of the room and pulled himself on his way with arms that miraculously went unscathed. Finally reaching Dr. Mario's Office after a painful, excruciating long hour, the mercenary found two heart containers, quickly using them._

Kyle and Oscar, impatient like always, advanced on Ike, who hadn't moved an inch since ten minutes of staring. Meta Knight quickly used Plan B, grabbing two paint buckets he had with him and chucked them at Kyle and Oscar splattering red paint all over their faces. Marth, of course, laughed. Kyle twitched in anger spun around, yelling "Shut up, bitch!" While turning and throwing out his insult, his broken arm brushed against Oscar, making Kyle swear and stomp on Oscar's broken foot, who in turn sweared, too, and started hopping around, smashing into Ike. Ike fell and Oscar on top of him. Kyle turned around tripping and landed on the pile. Marth laughed so hard, tears ran down his face, with one arm he was holding his aching side and with the other he tried to hold onto the doorframe for support. Meta Knight wasn't quite sure what to do, but decided to teleport him, Ike and "their catch" into his den.

After ten minutes Marth's laughter ceased into giggles and his vision allowed him to see that the others left after brushing tears out of his eyes. "Snap, now I have to save those twits."

It took Marth 20 minutes to find Meta Knight's den, sneaking silently through the mansion. It was quite easy to find out which room the duo was hiding in; Marth wasn't even leaning on the door, as he heard Ike pacing back and forth saying "I know he will come…" while Meta Knight told him to shut up and wait silently. Marth thought about breaking down the door, but then it'd be two against one, so he wandered off looking for a vent to crawl in.

_In Meta Knight's den…_

Kyle and Oscar sat against tied up and gagged. They had no idea where Meta Knight had found these circlets; they prevented them from using magic. Kyle, along with Oscar, killed Ike and Meta Knight over and over again in their minds. Kyle dearly wanted to sit on the two with his giant dragon arse. Ever since he flattened Kirby, he grew fond of using his giant behind making his opponents tremble in fear as his giant dragon arse loomed over them promising a painful doom.

_Back with Marth…_

He finally found a way to enter the vents. Currently he was nearly above Meta Knight's den studying the map he had snatched up on his way and was checking where to go next. Tucking the map back in his pocket, he kept on crawling as Ike's pacing and talking grew louder. Marth froze right in the middle of the room in the vent as he heard Ike.

"Did you hear that?"

"What? You babbled the whole time!"

Marth moved an inch, but hit his head, biting his lip hoping Ike and Meta Knight didn't hear the_ thump. _Ike grinned and pulled out a gun shooting at the vent. The bullet penetrated the thin metal, grazing Marth's cheek.

"Ike, you fucking idiot! You nearly shot me!" Marth shrieked.

"Hey sweetheart, want to come down?" Ike mocked, grinning.

"No!" Marth yelled, pissed off at Ike. Thinking of a new plan, Marth crawled forward in the vent.

"Fine" Ike said smiling, shooting again sending the bullet past Marth's side.

"IKE STOP IT!" Marth screeched, debating whether he should stay put or crawl forward as fast as he could.

"Then come DOWN!" Ike yelled, pushing an empty crate he saw close under Marth's position to remove part of the vent. Bashing off a part with Ragnell, while Marth had to cover his ears as not to go deaf, Meta Knight managed to push another crate over to Ike. Ike stepped off the crate, stacked the other on, stepped back on and send a piece of vent clattering to the floor, while Marth yelped crawling away. Ike snatched Marth's ankle pulling the prince to him.

'If Ike keeps this up, he might fall, but I don't want to tell him' Meta Knight thought, watching the scene and hearing Marth kicking and screaming.

Snake crawled through the vents when he saw Marth in the vent screaming and kicking and something and trying to hold on to the walls.

All this time as Kyle and Oscar watched they only thought about one thing: "He sounds girly"

Snake decided to help to help Marth and grabbed his wrist, before Ike pulled him completely out of the vent. Ike cursed and Marth yelped in surprise as Snake pulled Marth back up.

Snake and Ike kept the tug of war going for a few minutes, while Marth complained and kicked out aiming at Ike's face. Ike suddenly yanked on Marth with all his might. Marth screamed as he fell out of the vent tightly holding onto Snake, sending him tumbling out of the vent after Mart. Marth knocked Ike off the crates and he went onto the floor along with Marth and Snake. Suddenly the door flew open and Samus started kicking Meta Knight mercilessly.

Ike pushed Marth over pinning him on the floor, smirking. Marth glared at Ike, but before Ike could do anything, Snake yanked him off and pushed him aside, taking on Ike, giving Marth time to get up and free Kyle and Oscar. Marth didn't waste a second and was an instant by Kyle and Oscar untying them and getting the circlets off. Oscar teleported the unconscious Wolf away and returned back in a second.

Snake was doing pretty well. Ike was still worn out and missed most of the time and glanced at Marth, not paying attention. Ike landed a punch in the stomach, sending Snake backwards.

"Give me that" Marth said eyeing the bat. Kyle handed it wordlessly over.

Meta Knight and Samus still fought. Oscar teleported behind Samus and knocked her out with magic and teleported her away. Well, now Kyle had transformed and nearly took up all the room and sat on Meta Knight, toothy smile and eyes gleaming with joy. Until Meta Knight's mask dug into his ass.

When Ike focused on Snake Marth struck out with the bat knocking out the mercenary.

Kyle into the wall beside Marth roared tearing down the wall to the hallway, Meta Knight becoming round again and stuck on his butt. Kyle ripped off Meta Knight and bitch slapping him against a wall with his tail, getting the puffball stuck. Oscar knocked Meta Knight out with magic and vanished locking him up and returned in second. Snake had left while Marth and Oscar watched Meta Knight getting bitch slapped.

"Hey Oscar, take care of Ike" Marth said pointing to the unconscious Ike.

"No way! I'm not gonna carry him!"

Kyle transformed back and the three exploded into an argument of who has to lock Ike away. Master Hand floated through the mansion as he heard three familiar voices bickering.

"What's going on?" He asked.

Immediately all of them started shouting and yelling and the only thing Master Hand could make out was "locking Ike up" Sighing and mentally crying about another broken wall he would have to pay for, he said "Good work, you three! I will take care of Ike; you guys can search for the remaining smashers. As far as I know the only ones left are Snake, Ness, Lucas, R.O.B, Jigglypuff and Ganondorf." Master Hand floated away carrying Ike.

"How about we split up searching and when you find a smasher you tell the others." Kyle suggested.

"How we are going to hear you when you're further away?" Marth asked. The mansion was quite big.

"Wait a sec" Oscar said vanishing and reappearing with three flare guns. "Shoot up a flare when you find someone" Oscar said giving Kyle and Marth each a flare gun. Kyle walked to the right, Marth to the left and Oscar vanished. No one knew that Snake was hiding under a crate except Marth, but dismissed him since Snake saved him.

Kyle scanned the yard, but didn't see any smasher. He was already turned back when he heard a whirring sound. Above him Jigglypuff and R.O.B. glided through the air. Kyle changed into shadow dragon and with a mighty flap launched himself into the air. Kyle charged directly at the duo, who didn't even seem to realize that a huge dragon was right behind them, fangs bared. Kyle's snout was only an inch behind R.O.B now. Suddenly the robot flew up created a small burst of flames, which touched Kyle's snout. Kyle roared hovering in the air, rubbing his snout.

Enraged, Kyle shot forward and lashed out with his claws, making the duo drop and Jigglypuff deflated making a sound akin to a deflated balloon. Kyle landed in front of R.O.B and Jigglypuff. Jigglypuff was normal size and seemed just as dumbfounded as R.O.B., sitting on the grass staring at nothing. Using the tip of a claw, Kyle switched off R.O.B. and grinned evilly at Jigglypuff.

Oscar teleported in the training room. Lucky for him he found Samus; UNfortunaly for him he got kicked in the balls. "Fuck!" Oscar cursed and clutched his abused balls. Samus was already about to attack again. Samus threw another kick, but Oscar vanished, teleporting out of harm's way. Samus turned around to see Oscar across the room, smirking. They kept this up for a while as Oscar teleported out of the way every time Samus attacked. About 20 minutes passed as Samus got frustrated and tired. Two times Oscar leaned against the wall and vanished, so Samus ended up kicking the wall. Oscar also had hit her in between with magic attacks and tripped her 5 times. Oscar was across her again, again a smug smile on his face. Samus attacked again, fist reared back and again Oscar vanished. Samus whipped around finally thinking she got a hit, but her smile faded when she realised she punched air. Oscar appeared next to her, grabbed her wrist and flung her against the closest wall, knocking her out. 'I won't need the flare gun; she's the only smasher here. I wonder how Kyle and princess are doing…' Oscar thought, picking Samus up and teleporting away to lock her up.

Marth sighed. He was sore everywhere. 'I hope Kyle and Oscar find the other smashers before I do' the prince thought, closing his eyes for a second and bumped into somebody. Marth bit back a curse and looked up to see, who he bumped into. 'Great, Ganondork' Marth thought, as Ganondorf grinned at him. Ganondorf stuck out his hand to help Marth up, asking "Need help?" Marth looked at Ganondorf like he had turned into a pink unicorn. "You hate me, you never help me" Marth said, still sitting on the floor. Before Marth could get up himself, Ganondorf grabbed his hand, yanking him up. Marth yelped and jumped back as he received in electric shock. Ganondorf laughed and pulled out a present he had behind his back and quickly shoved it into Marth's hands. Marth immediately threw it away, since he knew it was another prank. Unfortunately for him it exploded not far from him, covering him partially in gooey, sticky stuff. "EW!" Marth yelled "What is that!?" while he tried to remove it.

Ganondorf howled with laughter "Rotten food with other stuff!" Ganondorf laughed even harder as Marth screeched "EW! Disgusting!" frantically trying to get it off. While Ganondorf laughed, Marth dashed behind him and tried to get the stuff off with Ganondorf cape, smearing it.

"Ew! Don't use my cape, use your own!" Ganondorf bellowed, yanking his cape out of Marth's grip.

"No, Ganondork!" Marth yelled, grabbing for Ganondorf cape.

Ganondorf grinned and cracked his knuckles "You know, I didn't beat you up yet for letting Charizard pee on me." Ganondorf advanced on Marth. The prince pulled out Falchion, but it didn't budge. Backing up he kept on trying to pull it out of the sheath, but the majority of the sticky stuff covered the hilt and the sheath. The goo had started to dry and Marth cursed constantly as he backed up from the Gerudo King, who was itching to beat Marth to a pulp.

'Crap! I can't get Falchion out. I guess I have to run' Marth thought, turning around, dashing away from Ganondorf. Out of the corner of his eye, Marth realized that Ganondorf didn't run after him. Heck, he didn't even try! He just walked after Marth, smiling. Marth's eyes went wide and he tried to stop, skidding over the floor. But Marth was too late, as a snare tightened around his ankle pulling him up. Ganondorf chuckled, as he watched Marth squirm and try to grab the rope above him.

"I hate you" Marth hissed.

"I know, princess, I hate you, too" Ganondorf chuckled rearing back his fist. Marth feebly raised his arms, although he knew it wouldn't do anything. Ganondorf send punch after punch at Marth. Marth let out muffled yelps. After a few minute Marth felt faint and barely noticed the blood pouring out of his nose. Ganondorf smiled, pulled out his sword and cut the rope. Marth dropped to the floor and screamed in pain. Ganondorf laughed and picked a limp Marth up by his collar.

Ganondorf howled up in pain as he was struck by a baseball bat in the back of his head, dropping Marth. Marth looked up weakly as an unconscious Ganondorf was about to crush him, but suddenly he felt someone grab his arm and pull him away.

"Darn it, how in the world am I supposed to carry Ganondorf?" Oscar complained, leaning onto the bat, so he wouldn't put weight on his broken foot. Oscar wrinkled his nose and covered it "Disgusting! What stinks like rotten food and other crap here!?" Oscar looked over at Marth lying on the floor, partially covered in goo. He quickly vanished and was back with a heart container in two seconds. "Here!" Oscar said throwing the item at Marth. Marth didn't react. "Hurry up, puss! You have to help locking up Ganondorf!" Marth shakily reached out for the heart container next to him. As the prince gained strength, using the heart container, he stood up, trembling and turned around to Oscar. And stomped with all his might and anger on Oscar's broken foot. Screaming out in pain, Oscar hopped around, calling Marth really bad names, better left unsaid. Oscar hopped around, insulting Marth and swearing, for 10 more minutes, before he stopped glaring at Marth. Wordlessly Oscar grabbed one wrist of the Gerudo King, while Marth grabbed the other and they started dragging Ganondorf towards the room, glaring at each other the whole time. How they didn't bump into anything is a mystery. After locking up Ganondorf, Oscar stopped glaring and said, covering his nose "Meet you at you room. We have to get that stuff off or my nose is gonna die" Marth walked to his room, wondering where Oscar teleported to. Arriving at his room, he filled a bucket with water. Just as Marth exited the bathroom, Oscar appeared huffing and red in the face slamming down a huge container of liquid laundry soap. "That much" Marth questioned. "If you don't want to smell like utter shit all day, then yes" Oscar answered. Oscar opened the container, dumped as much as he could a big bucket he brought and hobble over to Marth, splashing it where the goo was stuck to Marth's clothes. "Start scrubbing" Oscar commanded pushing a brush into Marth's hands. Marth debated if he should punch Oscar or not as the liquid soaked into his clothes, but instead started scrubbing, hoping the goo would come off. 10 minutes passed as Marth scrubbed and insulted Oscar and Oscar dumped liquid soap on Marth even where the goo stuck to the prince's face and rinsed with water and the room was flooded. And smelled like liquid laundry soap.

Marth was finally clean and wanted to put on dry clothes, but Oscar forced him to wear the drenched clothes dragging Marth out of the room and locking it from the inside. The two looked outside for Kyle, while Marth murdered Oscar in his mind. Oscar muffled a laugh and Marth looked horrified.

Kyle sat in dragon form on the grass, his tail swishing slowing back and forth, tongue hanging out on the side, jaws slightly apart revealing sharp fangs and a tranquil look in his partially closed eyes.

"KYLE, GET OFF WHATEVER YOU'RE SITTING ON!" Marth yelled.

The tranquil look in Kyle's eyes turned into fury as he heard Marth yell at him and turned his head snarling at the prince. Kyle had an idea and his snarl turned into a sick grin as he moved his ass and squeaking noises were heard. Marth paled and bent over behind a bush, vomiting. Oscar grinned, but also wanted the tea disaster to end.

"Okay, let's get this done. Get up."

Kyle lifted his giant ass and transformed back, pulling out another envelope. Marth had stopped puking and stood beside Oscar, still pale as he looked at the flat Jigglypuff "You sick bastards, how can you find that fun!?"

Kyle ignored him, stuffing Jigglypuff into the envelope and handed it to Oscar. Oscar glanced over to R.O.B. "I'm not carrying the robot, it weighs a ton!"

"Fine" Kyle said changing back into shadow dragon and picked up R.O.B.. He broke the front wall of the mansion creating a hole Master Hand would cry later about and wrecked some more walls along the way.

Kyle changed back, once the envelope containing Jigglypuff and R.O.B. were thrown in and the door locked "So, who's missing?"

"Ness and Lucas" Marth answered.

The trio decided to look outside again. Marth, Kyle and Oscar only walked, or in Oscars' case limped, a few steps, or hops on Oscars' case, and saw the two remaining smashers on crack. Poor Lucas had to listen to Ness rant and scream and punch a tree out of anger breaking his thump. And screaming about that. Ness, on the verge of swearing turned around, his eyes filled with tears of joy and his face sparkled as he fell to his knees thanking the sky. After babbling to the sky for 2 minutes, the kid began to move his upper body in a circular motion, hands up to sky and howling happily "Wooohoooooo!" and "Yeah!" over and over again.

"He's retarded." Oscar said, being nasty like always.

Marth considered stomping on Oscars' broken foot again, but turned his attention back to Ness. Now Lucas had joined him "Wooohoooooo!" ing alongside Ness. Kyle, of course, was peeved by now, dearly wanting to sit with his dragon arse on the little children.

"Grrr! ANNOYING SKUNKS!" Kyle bellowed and transformed. Ness snapped out of his happy… ummm, dance? Wiggle? Whatever he was doing! Grinning broadly, he was so happy now, that even Kyle with his sharp, gleaming fangs about to shred him to pieces didn't intimidate him. And usually he'd probably poop his pants. Ew.

Ness and Lucas dodged as Kyle's thundered down just where they had been standing. Ness used his psychic abilities making Kyle think he had to sit on Oscar and Marth, constantly causing a _thump_ as hiseversoeffective ass tore up the ground harming grass blades. Lucas made Marth think he was in the army. And Oscar wanted to strangle a certain Ness as he started to get feeling for Marth, but couldn't, because Kyle's ass was hunting him. So it just so happened that Marth had gotten sandbags out nowhere and build a bunker around him in 2 seconds AND adorning a green army helmet, screaming "Hit the deck, Corporal Arse incoming!"

Kyle gave Oscar a break and swung his ass over to Marth. "Shit! They are coming for us!" Marth yelled, whipped out a rifle out of nowhere and shot a rubber duck (When the hell did he get that!?) up Kyle's incoming GIANT _dragon _**ARSE OF DOOM.** Kyle roared on agony as the evil rubber duck squeaked, shoving its' way halfway up his ass. While Kyle tried to pry the rubber duck out of his behind, and Ness and Lucas rolled on the grass laughing, Oscar snuck into the "barracks", as Marth called them, and crouched down beside the prince. Oscar screamed internally, but couldn't keep the feelings back and tackled Marth to the ground, kissing him. Marth rammed the rifle end into Oscar's guts, making the demon groan in pain rolling over, holding his ball. Oscar wiped his mouth 'That Ness kid so, SO DEAD! This so disgusting! EW! I have to disinfect my mouth!' Oscar thought. For a moment he could control himself, he could stifle the urges and embarrassing erection standing beside Marth, who had the rifle loaded with ANOTHER rubber duck trained on Oscar's head. Not wasting a second Oscar grabbed the bat he dropped when tackling down Marth and teleported behind Ness, and struck the kid unconscious. Since Ness was cold out, Oscar felt all the lovey-dovey feelings for Marth vanish and Kyle had finally managed to remove the rubber duck from his butt. Lucas decided to ditch Ness and try to run. Marth still acted and shouted, pointing and Lucas "Intruder! FIRE!" aimed and fired his rifle releasing the rubber duck ammo, which successfully hit Lucas in the head. Lucas stumbled and was promptly bitch slapped against a tree by a snarling, peeved Kyle. With Lucas unconscious Marth wondered why he had a rifle and a pile of rubber ducks and why he was sitting in barracks. Removing the army helmet and discarding it next to the rubber ducks, Marth hopped over the barracks and picked up Lucas. Kyle had transformed back and dragged Ness by the shirt causing grass stains on the clothing.

"Hey, lay off the kid!" Marth yelled. Kyle twitched and flung Ness against Marth, causing him to fall with an "Oof!" "Then you carry him" Kyle growled. Marth carried both boys, each over a shoulder hoping Kyle would trip. After Ness and Lucas were locked up, the trio went to the lounge and Marth flopped down on a couch. Kyle and Oscar sat on the opposite couch, leaning back. All three were exhausted and enjoyed the peace.

Master Hand floated around once again finding nobody. The giant decided to check the room where the smashers on crack were kept. Everybody who should be there, there and in lalala land, Master Hand went to the lounge stumbling upon Marth, Kyle and Oscar on the couches. Where his brother was Master Hand didn't know and didn't want to.

"Hey guys, you did really good! How about we go the pizza joint and relax a little?" Master Hand suggested. Kyle, Oscar and Marth said "Yes!" in unison. The three were very hungry, since they didn't eat ALL DAY! Rushing off and trying to trip each other, or more Kyle and Oscar vs. Marth, at the stairs the three quickly changed into sweaters and jeans. Marth put away Falchion and off the quartet went to the pizza joint!

**Yay! I finished it! :D I hope you like it, it was fun to write. There will be one more chappie. Although I will continue crazy humor when I write the brawl fic! And sorry guys it took me a while. SCHOOL STARTED! AAAARRGH! And thank you so much for you favs, follows and reviews, I'm so glad you like it! You guys make me so happy! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, except Kyle, Oscar and the story.**

**HI guys! :D This is the last chapter, enjoy! Oh yeah, since the Fire Emblem story isn't done and Kyle and Oscar didn't get described yet, I figured I should describe them. Well, their looks, I think I kinda showed their personalities through their actions in the story and they will pop up even more through my fire emblem story and brawl fic.**

**Oscar: Demon. Pale skin. Persian green hair and blood red eyes. Slim figure.**

**Kyle: Fiery red hair, yellow eyes, slim builds, pointy ears (due to being to shadow dragon. When he transforms, his eyes stay yellow and his scales are black. I will post a picture of his dragon form on my deviantart account when I find the time. I'm bad at drawing people, so I will attempt to draw Oscar and Kyle in his other form, but they might turn out crappy.**

Chapter 6: Pizza Joint and the THRILLING conclusion!

Some pedestrian stared at Master Hand as he floated by with Kyle, Oscar and Marth in tow. Seriously, you would too, if a glove floated past you. Kyle pouted as Marth wasn't wearing a cape, so he couldn't step on it making the prince trip. Oscar wasn't allowed to teleport all the time, as it could severely freak out pedestrians, which Master Hand did. Well not all, since they went to Smashville town, so most people were used to floating gloves, explosions, crazy teenagers, Pokémon, etc. so Oscar limped all the way. Marth was happy that Kyle didn't trip him and his grin widened as they arrived at the pizza joint, starving. Now, it was never good when the smasher were starving like that. Like wild animals finding a scent of food, Kyle, Oscar, and Marth rushed forward each of them trying to squirm through first, shouting "MOVE! I'm getting pizza first!" all three jammed in the doorway. After much insulting, shouting, pushing, getting stared at and Marth stomping on Oscars' broken foot, Oscar teleported forward making Kyle and Marth fall side by side to the floor as they pushed forward tripping over each other's legs. Oscar ignored the stares and the crying baby and rushed to the counter ordering a pepperoni pizza with mushrooms, cheese and bacon. The poor clerk who is miraculously not deaf because of angry customers quickly hurried to get the order. As he came back to tell the pizza would be done in one or two minutes, Oscar started to scream death threats at him since he already waited TWO SECONDS! On top of it Kyle barked out his order which was a meat pizza with a lot of cheese. Marth tried to push the two away, but Kyle and Oscar elbowed him away, so Marth started yelling even louder than the two ordering a vegetable pizza deluxe. It took 20 waiters and waitresses, the clerk, 6 cooks and the manager to get the trio seated and served without them destroying the pizza joint. Now, Master Hand, in all his laziness pondered on how he could pick his non-existent nose, while the three argued, to waste time. Master Hand ordered Hawaiian pizza with nacho pieces on it. Now, you are all probably wondering how a glove with no mouth eats, but I won't get to that topic, since he didn't get to eat anyway.

Kyle, Oscar and Marth had token a bite out of a slice of their pizzas. Kyle was about to take another bite before he stopped looking at the meat, sauce and _thick, melted_ cheese. His eyes flitted to Marth, then back to pizza, Marth, pizza and every time he looked over his grin glued to his face grew wider. In flash, he scooped up the pizza and pushed it into Marth's face.

"KYLE!" Marth yelled, standing up, pushing over his chair and taking his own pizza throwing it onto Kyle's face. Oscar threw his pizza at Marth, but it missed hitting another customer. Pizzas sailed through the air, things caught on fire, people screamed, glass shattered, employees either participated in the mass food fight or fled and the manager sat in his car crying.

The food fight and destruction raged on, but Kyle, Oscar, Marth had fled the scene, leaning against a wall hiding behind a corner.

"Oscar, check how bad it is" Kyle said. Oscar poked his head around the corner 'It can't be that bad' he thought. His eyes went wide as the pizza joint blew up in a mushroom explosion.

"GREAT! Now there is no food there, no food home and all other food stores are closed!" Kyle complained. Silence hung in the air for a few seconds, until Marth pulled out pizza slice from his pizza he saved. "At least I won't starve" Marth mumbled. Marth quickly moved the slice out of reach as Kyle swiped out at it, growling "Give the food" "No!" Marth yelled. Oscar and Kyle attacked Marth trying to take the pizza. Marth dodged and the three insulted, hit, kicked and pushed each other fighting over the pizza slice. In-between Kyle snatched it, but Marth took it back, then Oscar kicked Marth in the stomach and stole the pizza slice. Marth tripped Oscar, reclaiming his pizza slice. Kyle and Oscar tackled Marth from each side and accidently smacked the pizza slice out of Marth's hand. Kyle, Marth, Oscar and Master Hand froze as they watched the pizza slice sailed through the air and smacked on the pavement on the road.

"Still edible" Kyle said, taking a step to the road. To their dismay though, a truck drove over the pizza, flattening it. "Well, can't get worse right?" Oscar said. But then a dog stopped next to the pizza, daintily lifted his little hind leg and peed on the food. "Oh come on!" Oscar complained. And to destroy all possibility of eating, the pizza slice spontaneously combusted leaving a tiny pile of ash. "Look what you did, Oscar!" Marth accused.

"Well, I guess" Kyle announced, sighing, and looking at Marth like a hungry wolf looks at a lamb "we will have to resort to cannibalism"

Oscar tried to grab Marth's arm, but Marth sprinted off down the road leaving a dust cloud at his spot. Master Hand had already started going home and didn't realise that the trio didn't follow him all this time.

"What do we do now? Our possibility of surviving ran off" Oscar asked. Kyle thought for a second, before he snapped his fingers "We are in a town, we will raid fridges and hope Marth doesn't find food, so he will starve." Kyle and Oscar walked across the street, already targeting a house.

Marth slowed down to a jog, panting 'Stupid, crazy, fucking Kyle!' his thoughts were interrupted when someone pulled him into an alley, covering his mouth.

"It's okay, it's me" the person let go of Marth, removing his hand.

"Snake?"

"Hey, I got some pizza and a Pepsi for you and a beer for me. I say we go to the harbour to eat, okay with you?" Snake said, pulling out three fresh, packaged pizzas, a beer and a Pepsi. "Why were you running?"

"Yeah, the harbour is fine with me. Kyle had the stupid idea of cannibalism!" Marth answered, walking next to Snake to the harbour. "What did you do the whole time?" the prince asked.

"Ah, just some stuff and sneaking around kinda watching your back since you had to tag along with those two." Snake said, smiling at the thought of the 'stuff' he did.

_At the Airport in Smashville town…_

"But Joe, there are mines on the runway!"

"Harry, stop being ridiculous and eat your doughnut! You're delusional, I'm telling you! We have an airplane landing in three minutes and there aren't any mines!"

"But look out the window Joe!"

Sighing in annoyance, Joe swiveled around in his chair. His eyes went as big as saucers at the sight of the runway littered with mines. Joe grabbed two flags and raced out of the building, stopped, hopped up and down and ran side to side without stepping on mines, screaming "Stop the plane! Stop the plane!"

But the plane couldn't stop the landing anymore, Joe shut his eyes waiting to get blown up, Harry dropped his doughnut and froze staring at the scene. The huge plane swerved sideways as the pilots tried to avoid mines and frantically tried to lift up again. The plane didn't cooperate, only inches away from the pavement. The plane violently landed, loud _Boom _resounded and Joe hoped to see heaven, but as he opened his eyes, a bubble landed on his nose and he realized he peed his pants over nothing. Where once the mines were, millions of bubbles floated into the sky all over the runway. Joe fell on his knees with a tear of joy, plopping down on another mine sending bubbles into the sky.

"If I find that screwed up retard that did this, I will kill them" Joe thought, before passing out from all the excitement. Are you wondering what Harry is doing? Harry, didn't look after Joe, no, he was having fun trying to pop bubbles, stepping on mines freeing more bubbles and running around and laughing like 5 year old.

_At the harbour…_

In a storage full of crates, two certain smashers enjoyed pizza and drinks, laughing and having a good time.

"Hey, Snake?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks, you know for the food and drinks, pal" Marth said giving Snake a high five.

"You know we should hang out more often, I mean our awesome friendship is so secretive. I bet no smasher actually knows that we are best friends." Snake said.

"Yeah, but I think Roy would drive you nuts"

"No kidding, how do you even deal with him every day?" Snake asked.

"I don't know" Marth said, taking another bite of his pizza slice.

_In someone's house…_

"Oscar, did you get rid of the annoying little mutt?"

"Yeah, I put him in the freezer. Got everything in the fridge?"

"Just about" Kyle answered, putting a ham in the bag and shutting the fridge door.

"Honey, is that you?" an old blind grandma entered the kitchen, looking directly at the Kyle and Oscar, who didn't move and silently debated what to do. Oscar teleported out in the yard and Kyle jumped out the window, breaking it.

"Let's go, I think she's calling the cops."

_Grrr._

"Did you hear that?" Kyle whispered.

"The vicious growling?" Oscar whispered back. Both turned around to face a huge shaggy black dog with vicious eyes and huge, gleaming, sharp fangs.

"Go tear them apart Rufus! Those bastards put your poor little girlfriend Fifi in the freezer!" the grandma yelled from the kitchen.

Rufus ears flattened threateningly and in a second he leapt at Oscar. Oscar vanished, which confused Rufus for a second but the giant dog quickly regained his composure and spun around snapping at Oscar's arm, causing a deep gash.

Kyle had a large stick ready. "Hey, mutt, over here!" Rufus vaulted at Kyle, Kyle held up the stick sideways making Rufus bite the stick, the massive jaws slowly crushing it. "Oscar, now!" Oscar fired a big shadow ball at Rufus making him yelp and fall unconscious. In the distance sirens could be heard. Kyle ran as fast as he could while Oscar limped two steps "Meh, too slow", but then teleported alongside Kyle.

"Ma'am, I'm police officer Dean, you said thieves broke in, can you describe them?"

"Oh, sorry I can't I'm blind, but I think they are gone now. Thank you, officer have a nice day." Grandma closed the door. From inside, crying from Fifi could be heard "Oh, don't worry Fifi, Rufus is only sleeping, he will be fine. Here, have a cookie."

"For THIS, I had to interrupt my LUNCH!? I hate my job" Dean muttered going back to the car.

_Back at the Mansion…_

It was about 5:30 p.m., the tea had worn off, everybody was awake and assembled in front of Master Hand. Kyle, Oscar, Snake and Marth returned a while ago. Every smasher remembered what they did, except Ike. Roy wailed off Marth's ear apologizing continuously, although Marth had already forgiven him. Ike had attempted to find out what he did, but everybody refused to tell him what he did.

"Aehm"

"Marth! I'm SO, SO SORRY! Please forgive me; we are still best friends, right? Right?"

"ROY! SHUT UP! Marth forgave you two hours ago!" Master Hand bellowed. Roy hugged Marth, smiled and finally shut up.

"Now, who is responsible for this?" Master Hand asked.

Samus and Pikachu blamed Ridley.

Donkey Kong, Fox, Game and Watch, Diddy Kong, Meta Knight, Falco, Yoshi, King Dedede, Wolf, Lucario, Ness, Bowser, Wario, Toon Link and R.O.B. blamed Marth, because they didn't want to get in trouble and felt like it. Kyle, Oscar, Ghirahim and Ganondorf blamed Marth, too, because they hated him and wanted him to get in trouble. Kyle and Oscar wanted to be the one's punishing Marth.

Mario, Link, Kirby, Luigi, Zelda, Sheik, Jason, Ike, Snake, Peach, Nana & Popo, Sonic, Roy, Pit, Lucas, Captain Falcon, Jigglypuff, Olimar blamed themselves and were nervously twiddling with their thumbs or in Ike's case, getting frustrated not knowing what he is blaming himself for.

"Okay, I know Marth didn't do it, so SHUT THE FUCK UP KYLE AND OSCAR, NO, YOU DON'T GET TO TORTURE HIM! Geez, you know you guys are frigging annoying sometimes!?" Master Hand yelled.

Silence hung in the air and Kyle, Oscar, Ganondorf and Ghirahim silently complained about the rules. After a few seconds Peach stepped forward "Master Hand, it is my fault. I bought tea and wasn't careful. I should be punished."

"Peach, you are usually very responsible. I don't think you need punishment. I will have someone accompany you buying tea for a while, okay, and don't buy tea from strange dudes in little teashops okay?"

"Sure Master Hand, who will accompany me?"

"Hm, maybe somebody who didn't have any tea… that leaves Kyle, Oscar and Marth."

"NO!" Kyle and Oscar yelled in unison.

"YOU WILL!" Master Hand yelled back.

"NO!"

"YOU WILL!"

"NO!"

"How about Marth accompanies me?" Peach asked.

All eyes went to Marth's empty spot.

"How did nobody notice him leaving!?" Master Hand exclaimed, like a tragedy had struck.

"You know, just because I go to the washroom and leave the room doesn't mean the world goes under?" Marth said leaning on the doorway.

"Marth, would you accompany me for a while when I buy tea?" Peach sweetly asked.

Marth sweat dropped. This was intense. He couldn't turn down Peach, you know she's quite lovely when she wasn't on crack, but accepting meant that if she strolled off shopping, he would be dragged into it.

"I… um…"

"He agrees" Kyle shouted, smirking.

"KYLE, would you stop pestering Marth?" Master Hand yelled.

"So, I can pester him, right?" Oscar asked.

"THAT'S IT, YOU TWO WILL GO AND NO HURTING, ANNOYING, THREATENING, OR KILLING PEACH, OR" master Hand bellowed, quite angry.

"Or what?" Kyle mocked.

"No brawling for two months and you have to clean the mansion for four months, little twits! GOT IT?"

"Fine" Kyle and Oscar huffed.

"And just in case you two irritable, annoying brats even think about it; Zelda and Samus you wouldn't mind accompanying your friend occasionally to buy tea, right? I mean you go shopping with her all the time…"

"Sure!" Zelda happily answered.

Everybody filed out of the room. Kyle stopped next to Marth, muttering "I will get you for this." And shoved past him. Oscar glared at Marth thinking exactly what Kyle had said.

_Later that night in Marth's, Ike's and Roy's room…_

"Marth, this is uncomfortable!"

"Just sleep, Ike!"

"Why the hell is there a huge hole in my bed!? And why is the floor wet!?"

"I don't know, Ike, shut up!" Marth growled trying to use his pillow to block out Ike's nonstop complaints.

"Why does nobody tell me what I did!? MARTH, tell me NOW!"

"NO, IKE! I shall SLEEP NOW!"

"But M_aaaa-arth!"_

No answer

"Fine!" Ike yelled, got up and jumped onto Marth's bed barreling into the prince.

"IKE, get off! Why did you jump!?"

"I don't want to touch the wet floor and my bed is uncomfortable, so make some space!" Ike said shoving Marth against the wall.

"IKE, GET OFF!" Marth snapped, shoving Ike onto the floor.

"Fine" Ike muttered, shoving Roy off his bed. Roy walked over to Marth's bed and snuggled in rubbing his eyes. Only two seconds passed.

"Roy, your bed is too short!" Ike whined, although it was just about the same length as his own, and shoved Roy off Marth's bed, squishing the prince once again against the wall and claiming half of the blanket.

"Marth! Ike shoved me off!" Roy whined.

"GO SLEEP IN YOUR OWN BED!" Marth screamed.

Suddenly the door was flung open and Kyle stood in the doorway, let out an absurdly sounding angry cry and embedded a gleaming huge butcher knife in the wall which grazed Roy's cheek.

"SHUT UP! SOME PEOPLE WANT TO SLEEP YOU FUCKING RETARDS!" With these words Kyle turned around, Oscar threatened them with a vicious glare and Kyle slammed the door so hard that it nearly flew out of its hinges.

Silence struck the room for a minute. A small squeak was heard from the washroom and Link poked his head out, padding over to Math's bed.

"Marth, I couldn't sleep, can I… please, stay with you?" Link asked timidly.

Marth was so stressed out at that moment and angry of Kyle and, Oscar, Roy's whining and Ike's complaints and rudeness that he exploded in rage "NO, TWIT! GO BACK IN THE BATHTUB OR USE YOU OWN FRIGGING BED FOR ONCE, IDIOT!"

Links eyes watered and a second later a tear streamed down his cheek. He didn't know what he did wrong and felt hurt. Marth sighed, mad at himself for exploding on Link, who for once didn't do anything wrong. "Link, I'm sorry come here" a weeping Link embraced Marth. Marth hugged Link back, stroking his hair, saying "Sorry Link, everything is fine. We are friends and I'm always there for you"

Ike and Roy chuckled holding back laughter "You a-are m-m-mothering him!" Ike chuckled about to explode in laughter. Marth glared daggers at them, telling them to not spill a single word. After a few minutes, Link fell asleep cuddled against Marth with one half of the blanket. Ike and Roy still stifled laughter. Ike grinned mischievously at Marth as an idea struck him. "Tell me what I did or I'm gonna spill the beans" Marth scowled, but knew if he refused, Ike would scream it out faster than he could shut him up.

"Fine, Ike, since you really want to know, _you _were horny and tried to date everybody. The second time you tried, you surprised me from behind, carried me to our room and tried to shove your frigging dick up my ass and when I loosened the crappy rope, I punched you but missed and punched a hole through your bed instead." Marth glared so intensely at Ike that the room temperature seemed to drop a hundred degrees. Ike suddenly remembered everything and went pale. His eyes flitted to the hole in his bed and in astonishment, he exclaimed "YOU PUNCHED_ THROUGH _THE MATTRESS!?" "Yes, Ike I did and if it would have been your FACE it would be shattered to million little pieces!" Marth snarled, trying very hard not to throttle Ike. Ike didn't even regard the danger of coming close to Marth, who was severely pissed off, and shoved himself onto the prince's bed. Marth sighed and before he could lose his temper and reduce the room to rubble, he grabbed a blanket and a pillow trudging towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Ike asked. Marth's eye twitched dangerously and answered "I'm going to sleep somewhere else, since _you _hog my bed and Link is using it, I need to find another place to sleep." Ike scrambled out of the bed snatched up a blanket and pillow, walked over to Marth and said "I'm coming with you, my bed is wrecked anyway"

Marth fumed, but accepted that he just wasn't going to get away from Ike. Without a word he exited and walked down the hallway, Ike following him. Roy wanted to be with Marth, too. Grabbing blanket and pillow, he sped after them.

Marth flopped down on a couch in the large living, closing his eyes. Ike laid down on the other one and Roy chose another one across Marth. Peace seemed to settle in as the trio drifted to sleep, but the peace had yet to come. Link stumbled in sleepwalking, froze, steered to Marth's couch, flopped down, and draped an arm over his friend, snoring in his ear. Marth moaned sitting up and wondering if was ever going to sleep this night. Deciding to try to ignore Link's snoring and pretending he didn't hear Roy and Ike snicker, the prince laid back down shutting his eyes. It worked for half an hour before Marth felt a wet tongue on his cheek and Link's voice softly saying "Ilia, honey, I love you soooo much" and with that statement Link embraced Marth and kissed him while sleeping, thinking the prince was Ilia. Marth jolted up and bolted off the couch, shoving Link off him. Roy and Ike childishly snickered and hid their faces behind their blankets. "Don't tell anybody" Marth growled. On the couch soundly asleep, Link tried to find Ilia, but only accomplished to fall off the couch.

For a minute silence struck the room and the only noise made Link, scrambling around on the floor. Marth snatched his blanket and pillow threw them to Ike, slung Link over the shoulder and tried to ignore his butt being touched with constant "Ilia's" and headed back to his room. Roy and Ike followed, snickering.

Arriving at their room, Marth dropped Link on his bed, took his blanket from Ike and turned to the door. "Where are you going?" Roy piped up, dropping his blanket and pillow on his bed. "I'm going to find place to sleep, and you will stay here Roy and sleep in your bed" Marth answered. Roy opened his mouth, but decided to stop bugging Marth for the night and resume tomorrow, snuggling under his blanket. Ike had claimed half of Marth's bed again and already fell asleep.

Marth softly closed the door, smiling at the thought to finally sleep.

_In Snake's room…_

Knock. Knock.

'Which idiot wants to be shot!?' Snake thought after listening to persistent knocking. Grumpily, he got up and opened the door. Snake's gaze softened upon the sight of Marth. Snake stepped aside, letting the prince in.

"I take it Ike didn't let you sleep?" Snake asked, thinking back how desperately Ike wanted to know what he did.

"None, of them did" Marth said, yawning.

"You can have the bed; I will take the sleeping bag. You look tired"

"Thanks, Snake"

"You're welcome" Snake settled down in the sleeping bag and soon the two fell asleep.

**Yay! I finished, I'm so sorry it took me so long. Sorry, that I didn't describe Kyle and Oscar earlier ;_; I hope you like it and please review! And thank you for all the favs, follows and reviews, you guys make my day! :D**


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